It is 10:30 on a Sunday morning.
Coffee in hand, I go looking for the cat.
Liza Bean Bitey, of the Minneapolis Biteys, having
attended her third fundraiser in as many days, is found asleep in the pool of
sunshine currently warming a particular spot on the living room rug.
“Liza,” I say, “Liza Bean.”
The kitty stirs not.
“Tuna,” I whisper.
“Tuna and cream and tiny bits of stolen bacon.”
“Huh?” The cat
snaps awake, emerald green eyes blinking rapidly.
Liza Bean Bitey, of the Minneapolis Biteys, a tiny example
of symmetrically striped impudence, a cat with a time-share in Val d’Isere and
the ability to curl up, undetected, on your lap, rises and yawns elaborately.
“I’ve had the most exhausting week.”
I bend down.
Anticipating the petting, she lifts her little face, closes her eyes as
I run my fingers on one side and then the other, from nose to cheek, from nose
to cheek.
She smiles. “That
was lovely, Pearl. Thank you.”
“How’s the
fundraising coming?”
“Well,” she says, “I think the people are ready for a serious candidate.” She picks up her
right front paw, flexes and detracts her claws.
“So a return to the gold standard?”
“Of course.”
“A thoughtful discussion of the merits of a four-day work
week?”
“Absolutely.”
“A return of multi-mouse housing units in the Executive
Branch?”
She smiles. “Can there
be any doubt?”
I lean over, pick her up.
She resists, as she always does, then relaxes. “You’re serious about this, aren’t you? You’re really running?”
Liza Bean purrs loudly, closes her eyes. I rub my nose against the top of her head,
between her little ears.
“Remind me,” she says sleepily, “to tell you about last
night’s dinner.” She yawns. “The most ridiculous people show up to
political fundraisers.”
“I can’t wait to hear it,” I say, grinning. “Whatever it was, I hope you’ve managed to
keep it out of the press.”
But it’s too late:
Liza Bean Bitey, of the Minneapolis Biteys, is sound asleep.
Bitey/Squeakers 2012 buttons and postcards available through Zazzle. Why not take a gander?
.jpg)
31 comments:
Liza Bean for President!
haphazardlife, why not?! :-)
Love the Zazzle site design! That's beauty.
4 day work weeks you say... how about 3? Come on Liza Bean, make it happen.
A Lisa Bean Presidency might be Catastrophic!
^
That is for your title which will now be running through my head all day!!
CarrieBoo, I love that you said it's "beauty". :-)
joeh, you're welcome! I do love me some Cat Stevens.
Oh, wow, you have Tee shirts with your face as a 9 cent postage stamp, in-ter-e-sting. WeLL, I know what I'm getting for Christmas.
If it doesn't work out for Liza we could use some fresh meat over here in Canada. Our political scene is getting pretty stale.
She has my vote. Any day of the week!
“The most ridiculous people show up to political fundraisers.”
That would be people that contribute cash to candidates for office.
Run, Liza Bean!
That Great Cat, She has my Vote. Go Liza Bean!!!
esb, the tee-shirt design came courtesy of Indigo Roth. :-) Very nice, although it does go against my Midwestern sensibilities in some ways!
Delores, Liza has a soft spot for Canada...
Pat, that works for her, as she asks that you vote ALL days of the week where possible.
vanilla, exactly.
mary i, she counts on your support, you know!
You have thinking I should try my hand on some zazzle products. Cats are big on the web plus your funny words might be a winner.
Do you think Liza will split the vote so much the Green party will have the majority?
So logic wise, does that work out to be an 'insensibility'?
bill, talk to Indigo. He knows everything about it!
Joanne, I think anything is possible. :-)
esb, hey! Don't make me pull this car over!
Pearl! Man, me and Tunguska got to get ourselves organised. Roth x
Indigo, why rush? The cat has just sent a bottle of gin and several large pizzas to your house. Why stress? Relaaaaaax.
I'm voting The Bean!
Corruption never before curled up in such a little ball of fluff.
I'm already on a four day work week. It's fabulous and everybody should have them. Day five is de-stress and appointments/shopping day, then the weekend proper is free, free, free!
You can count on my vote! And if I don't see her name on the ballot when I get there I will put her down as a write in candidate....seriously!
These stories with Liza Bean Bitey are treasures. You need to compile a kitty memoir: The dark and furry underbelly of a cat running for president.
Seriously, does this mean that Liza Bean is living with you now in your new digs? If so, what about Dolly G. Squeakers? And is she Liza's VP?
I heard this blip about Chicago politics the other day:
My father was a staunch Republican and voted so his entire life. Then he died and he has been voting Democratic ever since.
I think you'd get tons of votes (alive AND dead) in Chicago, cat friend.
She has my vote!
I hope it was those "silver-spooned" at the fundraiser - it takes a lot of money to become President :)
I am considering writing Liza Bean's name in.
Liza Bean for Supreme Overlord.
I came up with a new campaign slogan--A PUSS ON EVERY PORCH.
Liza Bean Bitey is my write in candidate!
Liza Bean is definitely a shoo-in!
I'm getting a zazzle button now!!
Post a Comment