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Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Sneezy Rider

Monday morning:  After a brief dabbling into sidewalk ice-dancing, followed by a light bit of graffiti-scraping at the bus stop (whoever Coni is, he has clearly mistaken my bus stop for his), I found myself feeling my forehead with the back of my hand.

Am I feverish?

My head!  My head is enormous!  Was it this big when I left home this morning?  And my ears – does anyone else hear that buzzing?  And the eyeballs.  What’s with my eyeballs? 

I take out a compact, take a look. 

Holy cow, did I look like this when I left the house?

And that’s when the coughing begins.  And with each cough comes the explosions in my head – near the front, somewhere between knowing how to crochet and my scheme on how to notify someone that I am in distress (it involves holding and actually drinking a Bud Lite).

For decades, I have banked on the words of a blue-lidded dental hygienist.  Palpating the glands on each side of my jaw, she had said, “You never get sick.”

And since that day, I have relied on her wise words.  Do I get sick?  I do not.  And you want to know why?  Because a dental hygienist in the 80s told me that I didn’t.

But here I am.  With every cough, bits of my brain are hurtled toward the cranium, my eyes pop and water, my throat burns with indignity. 

I never get sick.

Unless, of course, I do.


Send soup and foot rubs. 

24 comments:

Unknown said...

And sleep. Sleep cures everything.

For me anyway, so far.

I hope you make it through quickly!

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
aaarrrgh the lurgies... give up the ice dancing and grafitti scraping and get ye hence to that bed and body-warmer.... YAM xx

jenny_o said...

Right with ya, sister. *achoo* *sniffles loudly* *blows loudly* *sighs loudly*

Maybe the Bud Lite would CURE you. And me. Scare the bug away, sort of.

Anonymous said...

Oh no......not the January cold/flu thing...that sucks. Wish I was closer, I'd bring you comfort food.

Linda said...

Bed rest, lots of liquids and we'll see you in a week.

Jono said...

Starting out with sneezy I thought you were leading me to the seven dwarfs. Get well!

joeh said...

It would seem the dental hygienist has lost her mojo.

Lin said...

I'm existing on Dayquil and Nightquil as I type. I have taken the dreaded "sick day" and am suffering at home in silence--well...except for my sneezing and coughing. :(

misery loves company. You are not alone, dear Pearl. I hope you are feeling better soon.

Catalyst said...

Get well soon and for gawds sake, get a flu shot!

Geo. said...

Pearl, malade! Récupérer bientôt, mon cher Lert.

Joanne Noragon said...

Soup and hot compresses. And, don't sneeze all the way to Ohio.

Gigi said...

Well, if you HAVE to go to work (and aren't contagious), I would prescribe Nyquil and Dayquil (or the other one...the one I can't remember right now).

Feel better soon. If it makes you feel any better my ear has just started aching out of the blue.

(Maybe I'm thinking of the AlkaSeltzer Cold capsules?)

Sioux Roslawski said...

Oh, I was going to send foot and soup rubs...

I hope you feel better, Pearl.

Watson said...

Hope you are soon well again, Pearl. Take the good advice of bed rest, and Bud Lite....although I prefer herbal tea, lemon, honey, and a great big dollop of Jamiesons.... which makes it impossible to get out of bed anyway.
Watson's Barbara

Rose L said...

HONEY!! It is so healing. I will melt it in a cup of hot water and also use it in tea. I use about 2 tablespoons per cup. Drink lemonade and chicken broth. Eat oranges! Take 2 hard-boiled eggs lightly salted and call me in the morning.

The Cranky said...

Feel better soon, Pearl... we need you!

River said...

Keep warm, drink plenty of fluids, get lots of sleep. See you in a week.

Peter said...

You'd better find dental hygienist again to say "You never get sick". She had been helping you for a long time )

Linda O'Connell said...

Hope you are in rare form again really soon. It's miserable to be sick.

Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe said...

When one sneezes, people bless them, when one coughs, people desert them. i hope you will feel better quickly, meanwhile, enjoy the room you will get on the bus.

Pondside said...

I never get sick either. Ever. There are days that feature sneezes and the odd hot spell, but sick?....not way.
Visiting via Britta, I think. Now following.

Connie said...

Sending warm, fuzzy, chicken soup thoughts to you. Hope you feel better soon!

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

Oh no how terrible, being sick sucks, the fever, the aches and pains everything sucks, what sucks more is when you feel like death warmed up and you want to crawl into bed and die, until you are better and instead you have to get up get dressed and go to work..........

Launna said...

I hope you feel better very soon Pearl... I have not been sick for close to 8 years, I would love a 20+ year stretch... I keep telling myself I don't get sick, hopefully that keeps up xox