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Wednesday, May 12, 2010

The Lighting Must be Different at Home

My hair predicted – correctly – that the weather this morning would be damp and cold with a good chance of frizz and has since then assumed all the texture and gloss of twine.

It’s another case of you-should‘ve-seen-me-when-I-left-the-house.

Sometimes I have whole weeks like that.

Today, for example: not only am I questioning what might’ve possibly happened to my hair between when I went to bed last night and when I awoke but I am also wondering about my wardrobe in general. Why, prior to my leaving the house this morning – and according to my mirror which has never lied to me before – I would've sworn to you that my outfit was fashionable, well suited to me, and ever-so-casually elegant.

This illusion promptly disappeared once I reached the office. What was I thinking? This doesn’t look good on me at all! And what is this? A blue sock and a black sock? A quick check tells me that my shirt is on right-side out, which is always a plus in the corporate environs, but the two-different-colored sock thing has me a little concerned.

Two different socks. Humph.

I’ve caught myself frowning at my feet more than once this morning, as if there’s a chance that my socks will notice my displeasure and do something about it. I doubt it, though, as I’ve been displeased with my footwear in the past and it’s come to naught.

Although, come to think of it, I did once have a pair of high heels turn unexpectedly into flats, which was both exciting and uncalled-for.

Perhaps I should stop being so heavy-handed with my feet and just leave them be before one of them decides to get ambitious and start branching out. Next thing you know, I’m cutting little sidecars into my shoes like Grandma did.

I may want to re-think my position on colored socks and their relation to reality…

Note to self: Buy feet something thoughtful but not too expensive. We can’t afford to lose these two so early in the game.

26 comments:

BrokenSilences said...

I have sock and shoe problems often. It's unfortunate because when I leave my home everything is all and well. However, when I get to work it's another matter. For example, two different sneakers, a brown flip flop and a black flip flop, stripped sock and polka dotted sock - which by the way these mentioned socks are only inside the home type socks so how they managed to find my feet on the way into the office I shall never know.

It's a foot conspiracy, I'm convinced.

Jodie Kash said...

Once wore one each of a black pointy leather flat and navy pointy suede flat to work. I should expand my shoe wardrobe some.

Pearl said...

BrokenSilences, I've said it before and I'll say it again: Socks are not to be trusted.

Krëg said...

Just remove your mismatched socks and use a Sharpie to draw in matching ones.

Pearl said...

Jodie, so far I've managed to successfully pair up my shoes, although I must admit I once colored-in a hole is a black sandal with a black Sharpie. :-) Seriously. I painted my foot so that no one could see the hole in my sandal... Now THAT'S classy!

Simply Suthern said...

I wear white crew socks and Merril hiking boots to work. Hard to get those mixed up. I spose I could put them on in the wrong order but so far have avoided that. I have shown up with ye ole shirt inside out more than once.

I'm pretty sure you were still smkin hot when ya got to work. Mixed socks and all.

Pearl said...

HA! Kreg! I was writing about my Sharpie use while you commented! Get outta my head!

Pearl said...

Simply, I do thank you for the COMPLETELY UNSOLICITED COMPLIMENT. :-)

The check's in the mail.

Simply Suthern said...

Smkin= smoking

Unknown said...

Haha! Yes, baby those dear sweet feet before they rebel and get all narly and ugly looking. Because trust me, they will. I would post pictures to show you exactly what I'm talking about, but I'm afraid people with heart conditions might drop dead.

Pat said...

"I’m cutting little sidecars into my shoes like Grandma did." Lol--I'd never heard bunions described that way before. That resonated with me because my grandma had those, too, and now my right foot is adding on a sidecar. I can't find shoes wide enough at the end and narrow enough at the heel. Oh, the inconveniences of growing old.

furiousBall said...

I'm in foot shopping mode myself, my chiro told me my knee aches are due to not changing running shoes for 3 years. so i'm going to go buy some $200+ running shoes and still have achey knees and show that chiro. yeah.

Charlotte Ann said...

Please...don't whine about your foot problems. I'm sitting here with an achilles tendon that had to be detached to get to the huge bone spur that was growing out the back of my heal. After said spur was chipped off the achilles was reattached....I'm 8 weeks post op and still can't walk well yet.

I'll take the mismatched socks ...lol

Jeanne Estridge said...

I once wore a black 2-inch heel and a navy one-inch heel into work. It took me till after lunch to figure out why my hip hurt when I walked....

Kavi said...

it is for this weather prediction reason that i am beginning to increasingly worry about emergent baldness !

Sigh !

Anonymous said...

It's those kinds of days that make me think those burqua wearing women might be on to something...

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

Oh dear. I hate to say this to you but it's the wearing of different colored socks and NOT noticing it until work is the first sign that the downward slide had begun. You still almost got it all baby. Meet you on the bottom of the hill.

Jenn of Many Cabbages said...

Morning lighting is sneaky. It gets you feeling all confident about your colors; and then you go into the daylight and realize you're wearing 12 different shades of brown.

PS- I wore two different shoes to work once. Both black flats, but entirely different styles.

I feel your two-sock pain. I do.

Jon said...

And if you've paired your socks (I never do - I like the little frisson of risk it implies) there's another mismatched pair out there.

mromain said...

I have, for many years now, exhibited the disturbing trend of removing one sock when I get home from work and completely forgetting to remove the other. I'll walk around the house for hours without noticing. My wife has perfected her eye-rolling technique on the frequency of this one personal idiosyncrasy. Lately, my son has begun to exhibit this strange and troubling behavior, too. I'm not certain whether he is mocking me, or if he is just genetically flawed.

Anonymous said...

The first post was enough. Sent me looking for that little F button. I have added your blog to my Blogger's Cafe in Library 1 - Girls Blogs
http://avarchives.blogspot.com/

As for hair, the only worry I have, is what happened between 25 & 40; I turned right and my hair turned left, we parted company.

AV

The Savage said...

Mismatched socks are a sign of genius....
I don't have to worry about frizz considering I shave my head....

Menopausal New Mom said...

That cracked me up, reminded me of the time one of the girls at the office I used to work at was getting dressed in the dark so she wouldn't wake her sleeping hubby only to arrive at work with a black shoe and one blue shoe. You're not alone :)

Deb

Sultan said...

Colorblindness elegantly solves this problem.

Douglas said...

my mirror which has never lied to me before

You must have a well-trained and domesticated mirror... or a very brave one. Mine lies to me constantly, flashing images of an old man where a 19 year-old young man should be.

WrathofDawn said...

I have wide (and old-ish) feet and have trouble finding shoes that fit. Plus I'm not into the foot-binding-like torture of really high heels, so there's that. ANYHOO... when I find a pair of shoes that really fits well, I have a tendancy to go back and buy another pair in another colour.

I don't think I have to describe the hilarity that ensues when the shoes feel EXACTLY the same. What fun, looking down at your tootsies and realizing you have on one navy shoe and one black one.