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Friday, March 23, 2012

And Then There Were Thirteen

Every day's a little longer, every day's a little warmer, and to top it all off, Holy Hannah, it's Friday!

Can ya beat that?

Once again, in my pointless need to understand what's going on before it even happens, I consult my iPod's playlist in the hopes that, if I listen intently, perhaps while squinting, the future will be revealed.

For the Girl by The Fratellis
White Lines by Grandmaster Flash, Melle Mell and the Furious Five
Rollerskate Jam by Plantlife
Just Dropped in (to see what condition my condition was in) by Kenny Rogers and the First Edition
City of Night by Pink Martini*
Changes by David Bowie
Since You've Gone by The Cars

Hmm.  I've been seeing this for a while now, and unless there are strenuous objections, it appears that this will be the last fortune-telling iPod playlist.

Like so many things, that's the way the iPod shuffles.

Sometimes, you don't see it coming.  And sometimes you do.  Take last night, for example...

With less than two minutes left in the game, the mood around the TV had grown somber.

Dolly Gee Squeakers, formerly of the Humane Society Squeakers, sips her gin and tonic nervously.  Trailing for a good part of the game, the Michigan State Spartans, Dolly’s favorite to go all the way in the NCAA Basketball Tournament, seem to have forgotten their offense back at the hotel.

The cats in the living room – lined up on the back of the couch; sprawled monorail-like on its arms; perched, vulture-like, atop the TV, lean forward apprehensively. 

Orangey McStripe the Third squeezes a fourth lime wedge into a neat glass of gin.  “They came to play,” he purrs, insinuating, somehow, that they had not. 

Dolly Gee glares at him, takes a drag of her cigarette.  Tapping its ash irritably into an ashtray shaped like an artichoke, she blows the smoke toward an open window.  “Have you tried the guac?” she purrs.  “Woof made it.”

Woof, a black and orange cat with extra toes and a notched ear, abruptly leaps from the couch, tears out of the room and straight up the sheers in the next room. 

“This,” Liza Bean whispers into my ear, lifting her tiny, striped chin toward the windows, “is why we are forced to shop at second-hand stores.”

From the TV is the sound of the buzzer.

The Michigan State Spartans have lost. 

And the Louisville Cardinals advance.

Seven cats stand.  They nod at me, nod at Dolly Gee.  Woof, Dolly’s best friend, rubs her nose against Dolly’s cheek; and one by one they slink down the front stairway and out into the night.

“I’m going to bed,” Dolly says quietly.  “Thith hath been very dithappointing.”

I consider the can of albacore tuna hidden in my sock drawer.  I had wondered, when I bought it, if it would be opened in celebration.  I lean down, lift Dolly’s fuzzy little chin.  “They had a pretty good run,” I say softly.

She nods ruefully, leaves the room slowly, tail dragging.

The albacore tuna will have to wait for another day.  

*  What a beautiful voice this woman has...


Symdaddy said...


Oh dear! Your feline buddies should follow a real sport like soccer, not a sport that evolved from the girlie game of netball!

Such a shame their team lost!


vanilla said...

The Big 10 chances are getting slimmer. Go, Hoosiers!

Camille said...

She does indeed have a lovely voice but what I really want is to be able to play the Bouzouki like that. Oooopha!

I shall miss the Friday playlists, but perhaps you could change up and predict the weekends by another method? Might I suggest a tuna flakes in the bottom of a cat dish reading? It's similar to tea leaves - only smellier.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

Wisconsin fans commiserate with Dolly.

mybabyjohn/Delores said...

Very dithapointing indeed...poor Dolly. Hopefully the tuna will pick up her spirits.

jenny_o said...

Ahh, yes, cats - "this is why we can't have nice things" :)

Poor Dolly. It's a measure of your writing that I'm almost teary just reading about her dithappointment.

Simply Suthern said...

If the Ipod didnt see the end coming ya gotta wonder how reliable it was in the first place.

This has been on disappointing tourney from day one.

BamaTrav said...

I allow an 8ball to make ALL of my decisions for me. xo

Craver Vii said...

Poor Dolly Gee. That thuckth.

I crawled out from under my rock and listened to the "musical archaeologists" who call themselves Pink Martini. (Note to self: asterisks get noticed.) But I was also impressed by the exquisite cityscapes from that YouTube link. That was an outstanding photography!

L-Kat said...

I'm with Dolly. I had the Spartans winning it all. I'm glad you saved the tuna for another time. That would have been a slap in the face. Delicious wines and cans of tuna are meant to be celebrated.

fishducky said...

I'm tho thorry--pleathe give Mith Dolly Gee my thympathies.

esbboston said...

I am thinking that intently and squinting could be combined to make insquentingly.

Sioux said...

How about baseball? Does Dolly follow that?

I think you should give Dolly the fancy tuna anyway, so she can drown her sorrows in the tuna juice. Tuna is an equal-opportunity soother. Albacore to celebrate and albacore to commiserate.

jabblog said...

Poor Dolly - I'm sure she was very stoic.

R. Jacob said...

I actually like the list. I check for common areas of interest and some surprising choices. And the shuffle is never wrong!

I do miss the subscribe to comments bar.

Dee Ready said...

Dear Pearl, . . . those felines with whom you live could go in the Guinness book of records for having the most distinctive personalities among cats!

Now do you have any advice for how to help a very reserved five-year-old puss lose three pounds. She's fastidious and philosophical about everything but her weight.


Michelle said...

Yes Pearl..we can really beat that.
But the best is yet to come!
That would be INKY?
For " Ironicus Maximus"?
It's Friday Hound Blogging, Pearl.

Leenie said...

But it sounds like the party was fun. Any gathering that includes guac and a little curtain swinging can't be all that bad. In my opinion sports is just an excuse for chips, salsa and screaming at a big light blinking on the wall.

P.S. You look very nice today.

sage said...

There was some somber folks in my adobe last night, too, with the significant other having a masters from MSU. At least we won't have a knock down drag out like we did a couple of years ago when Carolina beat MSU in the finals

Eva Gallant said...

Poor Dolly; I hope she hadn't bet too heavily on Michigan.

Gigi said...

I don't follow basketball - even though I live right smack in the middle of basketball insanity. But give Miss Dolly my sympathies. And a scratch behind the ears.

River said...

Dear Dilly, I'm tho thorry your team didn't make it.

I'd forgotten about a cat's ability to climb up curtains, I may have to rethink my urge to get a kitty.

Susan in the Boonies said...

It's actually quite fortunate for her.

No cat with a lisp should ever pick the Thpartanth.

Tempo said...

A few days ago was our longest day...it's all downhill from here on in and personally I blame you for nicking our valuable minutes. Before long the days will be to short to heat up and the cold will set in for the long winter...guess who I blame for that?

Crystal Pistol said...

I know nothing of sports. But I do so enjoy a post including your smoking cat. :) Enjoyable as ever, Pearl. :)

the walking man said...

Pearl, give the consolation tuna. In E. Lansing they set fires in the street, so if your house is still standing the good cat should be praised for her restraint. How much of her life savings did she have riding the green machine?

Douglas said...

Sorry, Dolly... but that's March Madness for you.

And, Pearl, thanks so much for hi-lighting Pink Martini. Amazing ensemble (I hesitate to call them a "band").