tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post4693751513861683482..comments2023-11-14T20:29:04.094-08:00Comments on Pearl, Why You Little...: And Now, A Word from your Human Resource DepartmentPearlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261369905176088917noreply@blogger.comBlogger24125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-48269100526845001052013-08-28T05:08:00.616-07:002013-08-28T05:08:00.616-07:00Dirk Hardley
Acme Grommets and Napkins
RE: Instruc...Dirk Hardley<br />Acme Grommets and Napkins<br />RE: Instructions Needed<br />CC: All Executive Suite VP's and grander titles<br /><br />Dear Dirk,<br /><br />As a loyal employee and family member of Acme Grommets and Napkins and in the interest of correct corporate policy understanding.<br /><br />Did I understand you correctly at the last annual staff meeting that as a family that sticks together we should all remain informed?<br /><br />If so I offer my apology for not making your phone connection last Thursday with your mistress Jessica Biguns a conference call when your wife, of 34 years, called while you were attending the phone "meeting" with Ms. Biguns.<br /><br />Please instruct me on two things sir:<br /><br />A) Should I arrange all calls from Ms. Biguns to conference mode with Mrs. Hardly?<br /><br />B) In the interest of keeping a roof over my head and shoes (Converse All Stars-green) on my feet are you ready to discuss that 20% raise and extra vacation time now?<br /><br />Your Humble Quick as a bullet typist<br /><br />Pearlthe walking manhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10058913927297370740noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-36754441482200499662013-08-28T01:06:13.851-07:002013-08-28T01:06:13.851-07:00My workplace was called a big happy family too.......My workplace was called a big happy family too.....then they shut us down and moved away....as families do.Riverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14794655013673748992noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-16435821930677781462013-08-27T18:31:34.516-07:002013-08-27T18:31:34.516-07:00Ah yes, those company-wide meetings where all the ...Ah yes, those company-wide meetings where all the little people are invited. No, they are not hiding anything and they truly want to listen to your ideas and concerns. After all, it is not a company, it is a family. So sincere, so open, so transparent. <br /><br />You interpretation was right on!Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06032033918798053005noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-13485407577483340052013-08-27T17:19:31.486-07:002013-08-27T17:19:31.486-07:00Not funny.
I've been "downsized" th...Not funny.<br /><br />I've been "downsized" the past 2 years right before the Holidays. <br /><br />Being unemployed at Christmas truly sucks.<br /><br />Not funny.Agent 54https://www.blogger.com/profile/08168794460959854775noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-3270513546604145292013-08-27T13:20:40.083-07:002013-08-27T13:20:40.083-07:00So am I getting a raise or what?So am I getting a raise or what?Christian at Point Counter-Point Point Pointhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11447821094473597560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-14021049954269140262013-08-27T11:43:48.567-07:002013-08-27T11:43:48.567-07:00Eerily reminscent of my own work life.Eerily reminscent of my own work life.Elliot MacLeod-Michaelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03101422996950773526noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-77318547201722649212013-08-27T11:43:43.569-07:002013-08-27T11:43:43.569-07:00I often wonder who sacks the HR guy?I often wonder who sacks the HR guy?Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-72213798190225113942013-08-27T11:29:40.777-07:002013-08-27T11:29:40.777-07:00Ouch! Too close to the truth for comfort!Ouch! Too close to the truth for comfort!Jinksyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01686101468214361004noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-91919846972650869802013-08-27T11:21:30.889-07:002013-08-27T11:21:30.889-07:00Hari Om
aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrggggggggggggllllllllllllle...Hari Om<br />aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrggggggggggggllllllllllllle<br /><br />FLASHBACKS. I need a lie down.<br /><br />&<<Yamini MacLeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18383916589808462620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-10560911265248403822013-08-27T11:09:31.002-07:002013-08-27T11:09:31.002-07:00How productive should I be? Would picking up the ...How productive should I be? Would picking up the newspaper and such be enough?Susan Kanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09834094675218254410noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-45635621186484532582013-08-27T10:45:10.189-07:002013-08-27T10:45:10.189-07:00I would laugh, I really would, except I attended t...I would laugh, I really would, except I attended this meeting.Roseshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07469442580348062913noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-45593028486512285782013-08-27T10:22:40.913-07:002013-08-27T10:22:40.913-07:00I think I've commented before that I really di...I think I've commented before that I really did work for this company (although it went by another name). It nearly killed me and these posts used to give me seizures. But I actually laughed while reading this one. I also finished off a bottle of sherry.Moving with Mitchellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12954028272162285597noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-39536119812762087682013-08-27T10:13:52.447-07:002013-08-27T10:13:52.447-07:00This brings back chilling memories of the mass cor...This brings back chilling memories of the mass corporate layoff I was part of back in '02. At least I can laugh about it now.<br />HaHaHaHaHAAA!<br />*sob* Dawn@Lighten Up!https://www.blogger.com/profile/06301481567651330133noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-27963834570366879632013-08-27T10:09:39.830-07:002013-08-27T10:09:39.830-07:00We have had a lot of "restructuring" her...We have had a lot of "restructuring" here at my workplace of late so we have had a lot of interaction with HR...not a good thing usually lol. Optimistic Existentialisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11507986337866049924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-22457232680485480092013-08-27T09:11:21.951-07:002013-08-27T09:11:21.951-07:00In California, you can be excused from HR presenta...In California, you can be excused from HR presentations with a somnologist's note stating you've already lain awake all night quivering with dread.Geo.https://www.blogger.com/profile/16221314320558128986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-56147236172337698092013-08-27T09:05:09.069-07:002013-08-27T09:05:09.069-07:00Worse still is when the Dirks of the world are you...Worse still is when the Dirks of the world are young enough to be your child (or grandchild, as the case may be). Life experience and common sense sadly lacking, book-larnin' optional.jenny_ohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15475480579733466963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-25621137837989412272013-08-27T09:04:19.727-07:002013-08-27T09:04:19.727-07:00He omitted the line, "Workers such as you are...He omitted the line, "Workers such as you are a dime-a-dozen." I've heard that line. Not making it up. So, yeah: thinly veiled.vanillahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11978025976591113499noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-66293252356232690292013-08-27T08:39:16.105-07:002013-08-27T08:39:16.105-07:00I no longer worry about keeping a job now that I a...I no longer worry about keeping a job now that I am retired. I just worry about where I am going to get the money to pay for my yacht. Or rowboat... or rubber, blow-up, raft... One of those floating things anyway. Never mind. It doesn't matter.Douglashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09752593286034877538noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-23578694444976345212013-08-27T07:28:08.265-07:002013-08-27T07:28:08.265-07:00Dirk could have just shown the VMA's video of ...Dirk could have just shown the VMA's video of Mily Cyrus and Robin Thicke to demo what y'all are getting in the end.Simply Suthernhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13057516546779066925noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-53795183345980826062013-08-27T07:25:58.175-07:002013-08-27T07:25:58.175-07:00Originally called "Hiring and Firing," t...Originally called "Hiring and Firing," then "Personnel" Then "Employee Enrichment" then "Human Resources" in my company it went to "Development, enrichment and optimal allocation of non-mechanical resources."<br /><br />Pretty much all are just "Hiring and Firing!" joehhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08520161706680568508noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-49522318885843387572013-08-27T07:19:05.272-07:002013-08-27T07:19:05.272-07:00The perfect send up. It's funny and it's f...The perfect send up. It's funny and it's funny because it's true.lisahgoldenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11158660223296807317noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-78206196968972353272013-08-27T07:14:09.050-07:002013-08-27T07:14:09.050-07:00At least they 'thinly veil' their threats....At least they 'thinly veil' their threats. I've worked in places where the threats would be explained in detail to you.<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-40811521823911564392013-08-27T07:11:31.033-07:002013-08-27T07:11:31.033-07:00Dirk used to work for us in the staff canteen; rem...Dirk used to work for us in the staff canteen; remember that? But it was discovered that he was small-minded, unprincipled cad. And they immediately promoted him into a senior HR role. Acme Grommets and Napkins was a step up. With obvious boot-prints on those below him.Indigo Rothhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03957870121933442627noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1060614279393262320.post-21802269318209283022013-08-27T07:04:49.905-07:002013-08-27T07:04:49.905-07:00Every family has their dysfunctionals, and I'm...Every family has their dysfunctionals, and I'm convinced HR departments top that list in every family.Shellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04930262815304757150noreply@blogger.com