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Wednesday, January 22, 2014

I See You Have a New Grill, Friend

The new grill sits in pieces on the patio, a metal island in a sea of Allen wrenches.

It is August, and far too hot for this sort of thing.  Trista and I – both head-sweaters – have come inside to throw ourselves into chairs and dab at our red, salty faces.

From my seat in the three-season porch, I wipe the sweat from my forehead, press my sweating glass of green Kool-Aid against a temple.

Trista continues, stubbornly, to hold the instructional pamphlet that came with the grill.  Among the many things I like about her, aside from the way she holds the door open or blushes when I talk about my boyfriends, is her willingness to assemble large items for me.

Not today, though.  The grill, she taunts us.

Maybe it’s the heat, oppressive in its wet-wool-blanket summer-ness, but the whole thing has proven to be beyond us.

Deb sits up from the couch she has been lying on.  “When are we eating?”

Trista stands up, moves over to the spot Deb has vacated on the couch.  Deb lays her head in Trista’s lap.

One hand holding the instructions, the other absentmindedly wrapped in Deb’s long brown hair, Trista chews on the inside of her cheek while she ponders the unassembled grill’s schematics.  With a disgusted expulsion of air, she drops the booklet.

“It’s too hot,” she says.  She bends forward; and in a display of flexibility I would’ve bet against, kisses Deb’s forehead.

The screen door swings open, and The Boy, 12 years old, bright blue eyes blazing, explodes into the room.

“What’s going on in here?”

I frown at him. 

Trista, red-faced and flustered, looks at me, looks at Dylan.  “I’m so sorry,” she says.

“What?” I say.

Trista smiles apologetically.  “It’s okay.  I’ve got it.”  She turns back to the sweating young boy in the doorway.  “You see, Dylan,” she says, “when a woman loves another woman, it’s only right that she wants to hold her, sometimes maybe kiss her on her pretty little forehead.  But I never meant to show any dis—“

Dylan waves his arms.  “Pfffft,” he says in disgust.  “I don’t care about lesbians.  I meant that.”  He points to the grill.  “When’s supper?”

Trista pushes Deb up and away, moves toward the door, smiling. 

“How good are you with an Allen wrench, Dylan?”


Shelly said...

Dreaming of warmer times- I hope it helps you to break a little head sweat in this new polar vortex. We're having a Texas sized bar-b-que today- and I'm thankful I only have to enjoy.

Camille said...

That's a nice kid you done raised up there Pearl. Good job.

Ray Denzel said...

I love putting things together. My payment system is based on beer consumption.

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari Om
The grill, she taunts. The Boy's just hungry. All kinds of hot going on...and Pearl's keeping warm! YAM xx

Dawn@Lighten Up! said...

Ha! Keepin' it real, Dylan, keepin' it real.

Delores said...

A sensible lad keeping what's important foremost...when IS supper?

jenny_o said...

Good lad with the priorities!

bill lisleman said...

LOL - Dylan knows what is important - food.

Daisy said...

Whenever possible I get one of my sons to put things together for me. They're better at that sort of thing than I am.

And when is supper anyway? I'm hungry too. :D

jenny_o said...

btw, your title is genius!

Joanne Noragon said...

Assembly should be as simple and direct as kids; wouldn't the world go round better!

Launna said...

It is funny what we think children are asking us and it is something completely different... lol :)

maurcheen said...

Love it!! :¬)


Gigi said...

Any thing that taunts me immediately makes me think, "I CAN and WILL defeat you." and then I do my damnedest to do so. Stupid inanimate objects.

NotesFromAbroad said...

What does this "far too hot " mean ?
It has a vaguely familiar ring to it but maybe the cold has made me go forgetful ... too hot ?

besitos .. from the frozen outskirts of Lonelyville lol , made that up just now.. brilliant, aren't I ?

Silliyak said...

From the title I was worried you had new gold capped front teeth.

The Geezers said...

Nice writing. Again.

Out of the mouths of babes comes the truth.

HermanTurnip said...

The thought of lesbians grilling on a hot day....wow, now I'm turned on! ;-)

River said...

So ow good IS Dylan with an Allen wrench? and did you get dinner before midnight?

Linda O'Connell said...

Dylan figured he had a 'steak' in it. Smart kid.

Mitchell is Moving said...

Good for Dylan!!!

It took me a while (well, a moment) to figure out what a head-sweater was. I first tried to picture my mother knitted a sweater designed to fit only someone's head. Then I got it. (Besides, I think they call what I was thinking of "a hat.")

Daisy said...

It's nice to have friends where you can be yourself - and - enjoy a good bbq.

Dawn@Lighten Up! said...

Pearl be like "Where my pencil? Where my notebook?"