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Wednesday, March 6, 2013

March Madness; or Be Prepared to Loan Dolly Her Rent Money*


Several hundred feet of snow fell on Minneapolis Monday night, and continued into Tuesday, burying bus stops, rolled and flung Penny Saver circulars that never hit their mark, and the shorter among us. 

To judge from the amount of conversation it generated, you’d think it had never happened before.

And that, of course, is the beauty of a four-seasoned region.  Every winter, we forget the rash of summer, its insect-humming, thigh-chafing ways.  And every summer, we forget winter, with its snow-drifting, lethal-icicle dropping conditions.

And for this, we are grateful.

Without the March snow, after all, we would find ourselves nonchalantly sliding into spring, shedding woolen underthings and hats like so many two-legged caterpillars.  The bare, sandy sidewalks would continue to reveal themselves without fanfare, though eager for the kiss of bare feet.  Dinners and/or suppers would move from hearty, gravy-laden affairs to sliced tomatoes and various items on a charcoal grill without reference.

We can’t have that, now, can we?

No, no, no.  Like the brisk, musty clarity of fall after the exhaustive talcum-ing of summer, we here in the Great State of Minnesota believe in the righteous, last-ditch burst of winter prior to the warm-warmer-warmest breezes of spring, upon which we will spin, drunk with budding leaves and returning birdies, out of our wool and cashmere layers and into the cotton layers of summer.

It is a heady time.

Until the arrival of spring, of course, we remain buttoned and steadfast, buckets of sand at the ready, our weathered foreheads pressed into the wind as we shovel, as our forefathers did before us, a pot of Thai food on the stove, DVDs at the ready, the big box of Moscato in the fridge.

One rolls with the times, of course.

And the times? 

From winter into spring, they are a’changin’. 




* March is also a time for college basketball and unfettered gambling, especially, for reasons unknown to us, amongst the kitties.  For tales of gambling and loss:

Well, At Least She’s Off the Nip:  Wherein we are grateful that betting on college basketball is not yet a rehab kind of issue for Dolly Gee Squeakers, formerly of the Humane Society Squeakers.

This is Where Dolly’s Allowance Goes:  The cat reveals her system.

And Then There Were Thirteen:  Wherein the kitty sorrowfully realizes that she’s bet more money than she can afford to lose, causing her to stub out her cigarettes and take to smoking them in three- and four- drag increments.


35 comments:

Shelly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shelly said...

Sometimes my comments are too weird even for my own self...so I had to delete. Suffice to say, I'm sure Dolly Gee is going to have a great year this time around and bring home lots of moolah~

Watson said...

Can I come over for the Thai food and Moscato? I could cheer you on as you shovel.

Anonymous said...

Spring IS coming Pearl....it doesn't look like it yet but it IS ooming. I can smell it. I can feel it tingling in my blood (oh wait, maybe that's the meds..no...it's spring).

Pearl said...

Shelly, I've suspected you of weirdness. :-) And we're keeping our fingers crossed for Dolly's basketball picks this year!

Daisy, that seems reasonable. :-)

Delores, spring? Meds? This time of year, we take what we can get!

Optimistic Existentialist said...

I love living in an area with clearly defined seasons! It makes one appreciate them even more.

Dawn@Lighten Up! said...

". . . drunk with budding leaves and returning birdies"
Exactly!!
Thanks for that, Pearlie. :)

Unknown said...

I have on both the CH and cashmere, tights and boots, here in Wales. Yesterday was the warmest of the year so far for those across the south of England and Wales, and I shed the tights and slipped on sandals, just an experiment you understand.

We have nothing as obvious as snow to help us dress in the morning, so for me it is just the nigh-on constant adding and shedding of layers. Individual internal thermostats differ hugely, so other people seen though the window don't help either.

But it is March, and the Vernal Equinox is about a fortnight away. Something more definite is bound to happen by then, isn't it?

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari Om
Ah yes the four seasons. Then I came to India. Here they go for six.

No not cricket runs.

Six Seasons. Yes you read that correctly. If you discount the Monsoon and First Winter, then it's all the same really. Spring finishes next week it seems. The heat has already jumped the queue.

Back to you. &>

Anonymous said...

Soon we'll be slapping at mosquitoes and blaming the humidity, not the heat.

Vicus Scurra said...

You are truly lovely.

Bill Lisleman said...

same cold snowy weather just different food and drinks to suffer through it. Is that the gist of the post? Oh BTW some of that snow escape MN wandered down to IL.

Douglas said...

You would think we have no seasons here in the southern half of Florida (the northern end has them but we ignore those people) but we do. There is hurricane and tourist. I am not sure which is more destructive.

We also have winter spasms. This is where the temperature drops into the frigid 60's for highs and into the low 30's for lows. Those lows sometime last for more than an hour!

But it never lasts more than a few days to a week.

We stand aghast at the conditions you nawthunuhs must endure.

jenny_o said...

The fact that you sturdy folk endured another storm did not escape the notice of Canadian broadcasters either. It is all over the TV.

What we short people need to do in snowstorms is wear one of those driveway markers - the kind with the reflector at the top - strapped to our back, along with a hunk of meat - say, pepperoni. Then the rescuers and/or the St. Bernards can find us in the snow drifts.

Good luck with that shoveling!

klahanie said...

Hey Pearl,

How are you doing? Anyway, just recovering from the shock you get snow in Minnesota!

Have pity on me, yes me. We seem to be stuck in a state of permanent October in lil' ol' Britain!

See ya Pearl, back to my not worth reading site. Then again, Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar has 'pawblished' a 'pawsting'.

Your humble and oh so unassuming starstruck fan, or something like that,

Gary :) I'm outta' here....

Nancy/BLissed-Out Grandma said...

See, now, I just KNEW we had more snow than they admitted on the teevee. I am not allowing myself to think about spring yet, although I did enjoy reading about it in your post.

Joanne Noragon said...

We'll tell ourselves anything to get through it, won't we.

Belle said...

Far away from your home town, it is snowing here too. I thought it over for good, but no.

Marsha Young said...

Each time I read - or even THINK about - a Minnesota winter ... well, I just sort of curl up in a ball and turn my electric blanket up one more notch.

And I live in California! Granted it is Northern Calif., but still ... we are such pansies out here, compared to those of you who brave the REAL DEAL when it comes to winter! :)

Hail to you oh hearty one!

Along These Lines ... said...

I survived a couple of Chicago winters. Minnesota in Feb? I'm not that brave.

Perpetua said...

Well, I don't think we're likely to be measuring it in feet, but we're forecast snow next week here in the UK too. Winter really doesn't like to let go too easily......

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

"...and the shorter among us." <-I'd be so far buried, I'd be in China if I lived in Minnesota. Um, yeah, that doesn't quite make sense, but I'm grateful to be a short CA gal.

How do you make a post about Minn weather so eloquently amusing? Very nice job. Stay warm and above ground.

xoRobyn

HermanTurnip said...

I must say, Dolly has an impeccable taste in music. It's too bad she missed the hey-day of the mix tape scene of the 80's...

Marti said...

Yet another reason I wish I lived somewhere with 4 real seasons. The mosquitoes are already here and I have been dreading the summer heat for the last week.

Rose L said...

I am so happy I live in a place that does not get much snow.

anon said...

Dear friends you all know that is not easy to leave a relationship of about 5years and forget it and all the feelings that you both have for each other. That was my problem that i was having for the past 1month now i was really feeling sick and wanted to take my life but thanks be to ekakaspelltemple@yahoo.com who help me with a reunite spell for me and my ex husband and now i feel so happy that we are both back again and living happily more than ever before thank you doctor ekaka.

Geo. said...

Indeed, Pearl, one "rolls with the times" but sometimes one must be eccentric and resist momentum. Lately I've felt that quite keenly. Perhaps I should consult doctor ekaka. Excellent post...and stay warm, we need you.

the walking man said...

The cool part about winter in Detroit is that even the bad weather rarely dares appear here. That last one slid well south of us before turning North again. I think I saw 9 intrepid snowflakes yesterday, all of which were promptly dispatched.

The Savage said...

Back in ott-one (It's awesome that I get to say that) I was in Hamel (or were it Hammel?), Minnesota for training at a company I eventually loathed to be employed at. When we arrived in that October it was still sunny and not super cold and our little group saw that several (as a matter of fact all) of the fire hydrants had these long, thin poles with shiny fpags atop them. One of the trainees from further south (Arkansas I think) asked why they were there. I told him because they didn't want to hit the hydrants when it snowed as the big plows cleared the streets. It did not occur to him that it snowed that deeply anywhere.
Luckily for him, his duty station, when we all got trained, was in Minnesota.
I was luckier... Mine was Northern Quebec....

sage said...

That last snow all went south of us, which is sad as I was wanting a better base for skiing and the snow we have, covered with freezing rain, is now like cement... my sign that spring is here is that the skis are put away (along with the snow shovels)

River said...

"...the exhaustive talcum-ing of summer..."
There's a lot of that going on in my bathroom this year, and temperatures are predicted to rise again by another 5 degrees on Monday.
There is so much talcum powder that has drifted down to the floor I can barely see the tiles. I've decided not to sweep it up, when the powder tin is finally empty, I can just roll around on the floor....

Jackie said...

Perfect personification...
Love to read your work.

jeanie said...

I always thought if you rolled with the times in your sort of winter, you would become a giant snowball.

Darned comic strips.

chlost said...

Pearl, your writing is amazing. You hit everything so accurately for us Minny-soh-tans, and our trot inot spring, with just the right twist of funny.
Gawd, I'm jealous of the way you do that.

Connie said...

Pearl, you paint such wonderful pictures with your words. I love the way you write.

I'm ready for the budding leaves and birdies here. :)