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Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Part II: It's a Cold Time to be Alone; or Love in the Time of Collars-Up


In a move that has stunned Minneapolis neighborhoods, area organization Gloves Without Partners has congregated in what many perceive to be the first real indication of spring.

The gathering of single gloves began as a way of reconnecting.

“It was sad, really,” mumbled an un-named ski glove. “Here we’d been instrumental in keeping a hand warm and suddenly we’re on the streets, being pushed around by snow plows.”

“I’d lost hope,” opined a glove identified only as “Rightie”. “One minute I’m part of a team, you know, watching our bus-riding overlord force my partner “Stinky” to pick up litter, the next minute we’re falling unnoticed to the curb while she digs through her purse for her bus pass! You can imagine my dismay when she climbed aboard without us. I was lost! Lost!”

Many gloves tell the same story: forgotten on laps and dumped upon standing, left behind at bus stops, fallen from overstuffed bags, they are forced to live on the streets, turning to each other for structure, some resorting to anonymous, one-off hand jobs to provide the protection against the cold that they were designed to provide.

“I spent three days with a homeless man before he, too, lost me,” shudders a cashmere driving glove who refuses to give her name. “All I wanted was to do what I was manufactured to do. Is that so wrong? Is it wrong to give warmth? Is it?” It is here that the glove turns away, sobbing.

And now, thanks to the dream of two gloves to be reunited with their mates, those fearful, helpless days are over.

“We’re going to stand up!” shouts one working glove. “We’re saying ‘no more! not while I have fingers!”
In other news, large gatherings of cigarette butts and discarded candy wrappers have gathered just outside of the circle of streetlamp light on the corner of Broadway and Buchanan.

Their spokesman, an empty Yoohoo bottle, hints at big things come the true thaw.


Come back tomorrow for the third and final installment on Rightie and Stinky: A Glove Story.

25 comments:

mybabyjohn/Delores said...

Raising my hand over here...I've definitely had enough cold and snow.

Daisy said...

Pearl, you always make me smile. Thank you for that.

Waiting anxiously for part three. I am holding tight onto hope that Rightie and Stinky will be reunited. ;)

Shelly said...

What inspirations those gloves are. What, though, do the gloves do when it's warm in Minneapolis?

Powdered Toast Man said...

'one-off hand jobs' ha ha

Pearl said...

:-)

Gloves, in MN, go on vacation in the summer. Some of them retreat to large, Tupperware-like containers. Some "summer" in cold climates, just to keep their edge...

fishducky said...

I hope they're reunited--I do SO love a happy ending!!

NotesFromAbroad said...

Please don't hate me but I am sitting in front of the air conditioner and counting the days until I am back in the US and cold weather.
I find I am not the biggest fan of 90+ degree days anymore.
Love you. Love the cold. C

Ms Sparrow said...

Mine summer in an old VCR box on the closet shelf with singletons from past winters still pining for their long-lost mates.

jenny_o said...

"Bus-riding overlord" LOL It's not as bad as it sounds, thank goodness, because it's TRUE!

Love the picture.

Simply Suthern said...

The Glove in the middle appears to be giving the Vulcan, "Live Long and Prosper" sign.

Geo. said...

Pearl, these brave little gloves deserve a hand.

Jacquelineand.... said...

Definitely raising my hand here! Do please keep us updated on the saga of Rightie and Stinky...preferably the digit-al version.

Joe Pereira said...

Hahahaha, love it,love it Pearl. I have lots of single socks, don't know how that happens, do you? You could write about the worst tragedy and still make me laugh. I'd love you to join me and some of my friends for a night out - I'm laughing just thinking about it. I love your sense of humour(humor,if you prefer) x

Belle said...

The snow is finally melting here at home. I am tired of winter and ready for spring. I buy about 10 pair of little black gloves so if I lose one or two, I don't even notice.

Susan Kane said...

Maybe they could visit the Sock Drawer? Cross-cultural, but works for me.

sage said...

I loved your title and I have two missing gloves (or maybe they ran off with each other), but one of them is from a favorite woven woolen pair I purchased in Iceland and it's mate and I would really love for it to come back home...

The Retired One said...

think of the poor handicapped mittens, they can't even POINT to where they got lost. (*giggle*)

Jo-Anne Meadows said...

Cold and snow I wonder what that is like.............

Susan Flett Swiderski said...

I had no idea you had an epidemic of single gloves in your neck of the woods. Believe it or not, here in Georgia, it's single sneakers that dot our landscape.

HermanTurnip said...

I've once heard a famous speech that dealt with a very similar topic:

I have a dream, that one day all gloves will have a permanent match; a bond that no dryer can break. A bond that will live in infamy.

...perhaps I'm getting my speeches muddled up a bit?

Juli said...

We are on the cusp of what I feel may be the first year ever that our gloves will happily make it as couples though the season. I accredit it to my new "sign in, promise your first born," contract. And the holding hostage of iPods until proper return of said accessories.

Rose L said...

HA HA HA HA! YOU MADE ME LAUGH AGAIN!

diane b said...

Hee hee. A good imagination.

Linda O'Connell said...

I've been wondering about all the single shoes out there along the roads and highways. Think someone told them to take a hike?

Jo-Anne Meadows said...

Ok I have read this well I thought I read it yesterday but no comment from me here so I will write another one..........

This was funny and made me think about gloves that are lost and can't find their partner who is hiding with the socks...........lol