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Saturday, December 22, 2012

Didn't You Get Me A Box of Saltines LAST Year, Mom?


It’s been an orgy of gift-wrapping at the house, and frankly, I’m exhausted.

Wrapping paper, scissors, Scotch tape, ribbon, kittie treats…

Liza Bean Bitey (of the Minneapolis Biteys) is particularly prone to interrupting the task-driven moment; and distracting lengths of string and the occasional offering of bits of tuna have been offered in the spirit of advancing human/kitty relations with all digits intact.

Obstacle overcome!

But just like last year – and every year, now that I think of it – I’ve come across a problem: boxes.

I live in a small place, completely bereft of closets.  I have hooks, drawers, and the space under my bed.  Not surprisingly, I have failed to stock up on random boxes.

Normally, this suits me, as the tiny and inexplicably hairy nomad in my head is continually urging me to get rid of things, to lighten the load in case I have to hit the road in a hurry.

You just never know when you'll find yourself on the lam.

So while I spend the bulk of the year de-cluttering, sometime around the second week of December I start to realize that all the little things I’ve bought require disguises.

Wrapping, say, a hammer in the shape of a hammer is only funny on TV.

That thing really needs a box.

And it begins: the box hunt.

I’ve ransacked the house and have so far emptied boxes of microwaveable popcorn, saltine crackers, and even a metal tin of those fabulous little Danish Butter Cookies.

Believe me when I tell you that all of those delicious little cookies have found a home.

That reminds me. Note to self: stop eating delicious little cookies.

And so the oddly-boxed pile grows, as does the anticipation of giving gifts to those I love.

Ladies and gentlemen, we are mere days away from Christmas.

And I am giddy.

28 comments:

fmcgmccllc said...

Merry Christmas Pearl, enjoy those cookies.

Leenie said...

See! I KNEW IT. I'm not the only one with a tiny and inexplicably hairy nomad in my head.

Note to self: check all the packages under the tree for one that feels like a tin of Danish Butter Cookies. It would be a good idea to empty it and use it as a container for that big package of M&M's I'm giving to Beavis. Oh, Wait. I ate the M&M's. Nevermind.

Lisa Golden said...

Recycle, reuse. You're not just funny, you're green!

Merry Christmas, Pearl.

sage said...

Thank God for attics, I have enough boxes that I may just start moonlight--one guy and truck moving services...

vanilla said...

Storage under bed: loosen bottom tabs, flatten boxes. Get roll of packing tape at package and reconstruct. Problem solved.

Eva Gallant said...

This year I bought books for everyone; they wrap well without boxes!

Eva Gallant said...

This year I bought books for everyone; they wrap well without boxes!

A Daft Scots Lass said...

Happy Holidays

OldLady Of The Hills said...

I try to send Gifts from places that do all the wrapping, etc...But, I do have quite a few boxes of different sizes 'at the ready'---In Case...lol!
Sometimes I think it is better to have limited space available for storage....If there isn't any room, there is no problem! It's all..."Outsenzie!"

Lucy said...

Newspaper - that's the answer; roll gifts in newspaper and put the pretty wrap on the outside. That way, everyone thinks you've given them a tube.

Have a very happy Christmas.

Looking forward to your posts in 2013.

Lucy

Daisy said...

Ah, the elusive box hunt. Best of luck in your search. Merry Christmas, Pearl! :-)

Joanne Noragon said...

Giddy is good. Keeps ya laughing.

jabblog said...

You see? Decluttering isn't always a good thing . . .

Happy Christmas:-)

Jen said...

I did all my shopping off the TV this year...QVC, HSN...they come in boxes. I like your idea, though. I may put my daughter's gift in a popcorn box just for fun.

jenny_o said...

I have boxes that have been around since The First Christmas and I am unreasonably attached to them. My point is that you're better off finding boxes as you need them. That way they don't become part of the family :)

Merry Christmas, Pearl!

Dawn @Lighten Up! said...

I don't know, Pearlie - I think a hammer wrapped in the shape of a hammer is funny all the dang time.
Merry Christmas, dear friend.
Oooooooxooooooo

Gigi said...

Oh boxes. Have I got boxes. I even moved some of these boxes (empty) with me from Texas. Yes, I am insane.

But you've got the BEST boxes at your disposal. At the office. Look at those boxes that the office supplies are housed in - especially the boxes that hold the redrope expansion envelopes....why those are really sturdy. There, box problem solved and no calories ingested.

Austan said...

mmm...Danish butter cookies... Merry Christmas, Pearl!!!!!

NotesFromAbroad said...

Ahh, you reminded me to buy gift wrap :)
And I have no boxes.
We will have a Christmas of Looking Back and Looking Forward .. All is good.
besos, Merry Merry & Happy Happy ..

Red said...

Super way to feel...giddy.
We have decorated boxes that we just stick the gift in and there it's wrapped. Take the gift out and give me back the box! Permanent wrapping!!!

bill lisleman said...

giddy as a hammer in a saltine box - I have plenty of boxes in our basement that I would gladly give you.
Merry Christmas

Jo-Anne Meadows said...

I was lucky to score a few old shoe boxes a couple of months back and they came in handy when wrapping gifts this year..........I eat far to much good stuff at this time of year......lol

Rose L said...

Ahh, go on and enjoy those delicious little cookies...and throw in some fudge!

River said...

What Gigi said about office supply boxes and also in November put up a notice asking for empty shoe boxes. or even empty tissue boxes.
I hat those Danish butter cookies. If I get any for Christmas, I'll send them over, okay?

The Elephant's Child said...

Some years ago my youngest brother did his Christmas shopping while drunk. He bought gifts anywhere he was served by good looking women. He came home and wrapped them. On Christmas morning he put gift tags on the gifts. An interesting approach which he hasn't repeated. Yet.

Lulu LaBonne said...

Is that what you're supposed to do, all these years I've been giving people boxes of saltines and made the wrapping in the shape of a hammer.

Happy Christmas Pearl may you get many exciting boxes x

Pat said...

I should have used boxes - then at least they would have a shape.
Gift wrapping is not my bag and even using sparkley accoutrements they still end up looking like charity shope rejects.
Still it's the thought that counts. I'm told.

Kathleen McCoy said...

Good for you, Pearl! Christmas isn't Christmas without little butter cookies. Merry Christmas and may 2013 be your best year yet!