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Monday, June 11, 2012

The Fly, or I Choose to Live in the Light


The fly slips into the apartment a little after noon.

I set my purse down, slip off my shoes and sigh.  Newly-moved on to the third floor, where I have discovered that I am devoid of scissors, nail clippers, decent lighting, or salt and pepper, a fly swatter is also unaccounted for.

I close the door.

“Well I’m not going to feed ya,” I mutter.

Earlier in the day I’d been trying my neighborhood wireless signals, hoping, fruitlessly, that someone’s password was, indeed, “password”. 

I report without satisfaction that none of my neighbors are that stupid.

It’s lonely at the top. 

But now I have company.

The fly bounces off the walls, against the shadowed ceiling, looking for an exit. 

I lower my chin, make menacing eyes at the fly.  “I shall be forced to kill you,” I say, ominously.

The fly crawls up the wall and says nothing.

The third floor, a dim and cave-like place with an angled ceiling, offers little escape.  I search for something to roll up and kill him with. 

I search in vain.

Dejectedly, I stand in the middle of the loft and sigh.  “Then again, maybe you’ll stay for dinner?  How much can you eat anyway, am I right?”

The fly buzzes, heads toward the door, the filtered light streaming through its glass and onto a puddle on the floor, settles on the light switch.  I walk toward it, already working on the story I will tell of how I stalked and caught a fly with my bare hands…

And there, under the fly, I discover the dimmer switch.

I reach toward it, slide the tiny lever upward.

And the room explodes with light.

Smiling, I open the door, and the fly escapes, to buzz another day.

42 comments:

Lynn said...

You had a little fly entertainment and the fly went on to live another day. It worked out for both of you, seems like. :)

Pearl said...

Lynn, it was a pretty "fly" experience. :-) (See that? I'm hip. Right? Are we still saying "hip"?)
:-)

Eskimo Bob said...

Apparently the dimmer switch is somehow connected to the neurotransmitter, making more than just the light bulb bright.

joeh said...

A sure way to make a fly dissapear is to hold onto a fly-swatter.

Oh, can you tell me how to change my password?


Cranky

CarrieBoo said...

"and says nothing" LOL! Not the best dinner conversationalists, are they. Brandon can catch fly's with his bare hand... that is a real skill.

Let there be light! ;)

Nessa Roo said...

Interesting fact about flies: they always lift off by flying BACKWARDS! so sneak up behind and clap your hands over the air just behind your hungry friend. Works every time... (well, maybe not EVERY time, but with practice...)

mybabyjohn/Delores said...

You gotta get yourself internet in that tree house Pearl... I can't imagine walking up three floors. I'd have to stop and take a weeks rest after every flight. Just a thought...try the street name as a password. Some of us aren't very inventive.

Mel said...

Let there be light! Hope you get settled in quickly and find all the little comforts of life. In my world, a flyswatter is crucial, for those too foolish to accept my offer to fly back outside. Of course, when your summer involves a dead opossum under the porch, the flies are more like extras in a horror movie. So, I guess my moral here is count your blessings? Best of luck in your new digs, and with finding a password that works! (I googled for you and the most common are variations of 123456 through 123456789)

Pearl said...

You guys are so helpful! :-) Yes, I can't wait to get back online -- I've been remiss in hitting up your blogs, and frankly, it's lonely. Although I am through the first 500 pages of the first book of Game of Thrones!

middle child said...

I imagine the fly was a little gift from God. Wishing you peace. Oh....and WI-FI.

Roshni said...

That fly had been sent to 'enlighten' you! Good thing you didn't kill it!!

Shea Goff said...

yay! Light.

Hilary said...

Good for you for letting it live. Tomorrow it will whisper the password in your ear.

Susan in the Boonies said...

I love that I learned that flys lift off backwards from reading your comments.
I am of the "die, fly, die" school of co-existence.
Glad your new "friend" hit the road, as it were.
I would have diminished the earth's fly population, and felt no remorse.

Joanne said...

How satisfying. Like finding the tiny fan symbol in my old Datsun and getting heat in the winter.

Hannah Denski said...

As I say, things / people / flies... all happens for a reason... : ) x

Sausage Fingers said...

Hope all is well, did you move?
I just got back from being a guest of the State of Florida...no flies but plenty of roaches.
Cheers, Sausage...

ND Mitchell said...

Glad it was a nice happy Hollywood ending!

savannah said...

i hate dimmer switches, sugar! i am glad you found it though! xoxoxox

Ian Lidster said...

You let the fly go! Wonderful karmic things are going to happen for you, my love, and you'll deserve them all.

As for flies, I detest everything they stand for. I love the description of the fly by poet Kark Shapiro:
'O hideous little bat, the size of snot,
With polyhedral eye and shabby clothes ...'

Laraine Eddington said...

Thanks for letting that fly go, now he's pestering me. Next time, show no mercy.

Joyful Things said...

That fly was very helpful, almost like he knew..........

Reminder to self, live as if you don't want to come back as a fly.

jenny_o said...

Serendipity - dontcha love it! It's great that you got the light problem solved; the rest of the missing items are mere piffle. Why, I bet you have salt and pepper in your desk drawer at work ... all the best with your new place.

Indigo Roth said...

Hey Pearl! You are correct; the top is indeed a very heady place to be. I love the picture of light, breeze, and aerial coprophages you painted here. Indigo x

drollgirl said...

i guess i'd rather have a fly as a visitor than a mosquito!

one time i heard that a fly barfs every time he lands. wtf!?!?!?!? that can't be true, but for some reason i remember it!

Silliyak said...

Clapping behind the fly is true, except that if you miss they seem to learn (ALL? Just the one?) until that generation has "flown on" (My observation, as always I could be full of what fly's love)

And had you considered chasing the fly shouting "Wait! There is much our species can learn from each other!"

And if you kissed it, maybe it would turn into Jeff Goldbloom. (it's true I didn't sleep a lot last night....

esbboston said...

Duh! Who needs internet, food, or even any-ting else in the whole wide world (another www) IF you have one solitary fly, a fly you can name, teach tricks, learn to play fetch, hide-und-seek, red rover red rover can Jeff Goldsomethingsomething come over, oh, the possibilities are half way to endless.

Just as soon as I sat my iPad down to get out the left over I-talian food from last night, I saw a fly on the bar in the kitchen. I just wanted ta let ya know that I did none of those aforementioned things. Why? I already have a dog and as a secondary issue, a wife, for pets.

Now back to reading the rest of your story as my food heats so I can soon eats.

Bodacious Boomer said...

You are kind to let it live. If it'd visited me the story woulda ended quite differently.

Ms Sparrow said...

The light will make reading easier for you. Commence the "Game of Thrones"!

NotesFromAbroad said...

So, the fly lead you to the Light ?
There is something almost ... biblical about this .. If one of the cats had been there, the story would have been entirely different ..

Crystal Pistol said...

I enjoyed reading about your "fly" experience. And, yes, I believe we are saying hip these days.

I do anyway... but I also say "groovey" and "yikes" so maybe it's best not to take my word for it. :)

Eva Gallant said...

It was for the best that he flew away; you would have tired of the one-sided conversation eventually!

Diane said...

Light changes everything. Especially perspective.

The Elephant's Child said...

Let there be light. Makes a huge difference doesn't it?

River said...

I'm so glad that little fly showed you the light.

Twisted Scottish Bastard said...

Use Raid.
Or get one of those electrified tennis raquets like I got for my wife's Christmas.

The flies explode so nicely.

Linda O'Connell said...

When all else fails, sritz hairspray and then smack him to the moon.

the walking man said...

bzzbbbzzszzszzzzbzzzbbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Meeling said...

You are much kinder than me - flies do not last long around here. I learned the two handed sneak up on them trick from my grandpa years ago - works like a charm.

Wishing you speedy wifi!

Laurel's Quill said...

Okay...should I be feeling sorry for you by now???? If not, I am at least intrigued by WHY you moved into this low tech place in the city where a fly is your entertainment!! LOL! great fodder for blogging, but???? Hope things improve!

ThreeOldKeys said...

... the dark side of the moon ... but with trees and friends and laughter ... be sure to surround yourself with stuff that makes you smile.

... go on, find something un-Pearly-outlandish, and hang it on that one blank wall.

... it's a brand new day.

... that will be 5 cents, please.

NellieVaughn said...

I don't mind flies at all, except when I am sleeping, or when I have company. There's something about a fly anywhere near me that leads people to believe I don't bathe.