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Thursday, October 13, 2011

Now About That Dirty Mind…

I bought – and then used – a neti pot.

I’ve never felt so clean.

As some of you may know, I’ve been decidedly under the weather for over a month now. I try not to make a fuss, coming from a line of people who believe that “under the weather” is Midwestern code for “trying to get out of something”, but I can take it no longer. I am tired, dizzy, and dangerously close to losing my sense of humor.

Let’s let the medical profession take a crack at it.

In the meantime, I’ve tried this new-fangled “neti pot”. You’ve tried one, I’m sure. As with many things, ie., pedicures, flat irons, this whole “paying your taxes” thing, I suspect I’m at the tail end of this.

The very thought, of course, was not without its ability to produce anxiety. A little teapot-looking thing, you say? A sinus-lavage sort of thing? Who comes up with this stuff?

We have the Indians to thank.

What a concept! To rinse out one’s sinuses! There aren’t enough exclamation points for how wonderful I think this is.

Picture, if you will, the furtive movements of the woman who has actually firmly shut the bathroom door. Right there, you can see how serious I am about it. Frankly, our bathroom door is a bit sticky, so just having the door touch the door jamb is enough – shutting it all the way takes effort best left for, say, doing the dishes or checking your Facebook status. Shutting the door to the point of being able to lock it smacks of exertion, doesn’t it?

No point in overkill.

Warm water. A salt/baking soda/Dr Pepper solution. Head over the sink, tilted a wee bit forward and, as we used to say: voila! Fish and chips.

Should the need arise, we can now eat off my sinuses.

That said, however, there’s still something wrong with my head – and I do mean that in a literal way. Another call in to the doctor and I’ve gotten downright assertive in my demands for a blood test, which is to say, in Minnesota terms, I’ve come out and said, over the phone, “I really must insist that we look into this further. Can we do a blood test?”

And just to show that I shall not be swayed, once I’m in the doctor’s office, I shall repeat myself, pursing my lips and looking stern.

I’ll keep you apprised.

47 comments:

George said...

I was surprised at how much the netti pot worked the first time that I used one for my allergies. I swear by them now.

Eva Gallant said...

I've never had the courage to try a netipot. I have a niece who swears by it. Glad it helped you.

Leenie said...

Best wishes for finding a cure that involves good drugs!

The Vegetable Assassin said...

I've had sinus problems my whole life of the hayfever/allergy variety but I never could bring myself to use a Neti Pot because really...the nose is a one way street. Occasionally you sneeze and goo comes out but never should anything but oxygen go IN. It's why I never took up drugs! So the idea of pouring salted whatsits up my nostrils is making me queasy ok. I even pinch my nose jumping in the pool. :)

Feel better! Keep your big, important head, happy!

Pearl said...

George, MN can be very dry at this time of year. It's been good for that...

Eva, the only thing to remember is keep your head tilted (over the sink) and FORWARD. Otherwise, you really do get "water up your nose". Seriously, it's far easier than you suspect. :-)

Leenie, I've not been given the good drugs yet! Appt is in less than two hours, a mere six-minute walk through the skyway...

Pearl said...

VA, I honestly don't think it's a sinus issue. At first I did, but now my stomach is in on it, too. :-) Thanks for calling my head "big" and "important". :-) I laughed. And seriously, you could try the netipot. It's so easy that you'll be like whaaaa?! I was worried about THAT?! :-)

Vicus Scurra said...

I am only glad that you read the instructions and used it to clean your nasal area.
I am to refined to write more.

Douglas said...

Pearl, I am way ahead of you but... (there's always a "but" and sometimes a "butt") I don't use a Neti pot, I use a "nasal wash cup" (sometimes referred to as a "nasal douce") and something called Alcolol (no, that's not misspelled). You mix the Alcolol with warm water (50/50) in the cup, the spout of the cup fits neatly and prevents spillage. The Alcolol stings a little because of a tiny bit of grain alcohol in it (which means you won't find it on the shelf, you have to ask a pharmacist for it). It has eucalyptus in it also which helps keep the sinuses open and clear. Very refreshing once you get used to it. I used to use a vinegar, kosher salt (no iodine), and water solution but the Alcolol is much better, trust me. It was recommended to me by an ENT.

Doubting Thomas said...

Love the neti pot. Still can't get over the sensation that I'm snorting chlorinated pool water. Being the uncoordinated person that I am, I did snort a lil' too much water until I mastered the correct posture.

I sincerely hope you find a solution to what ails you. A Pearl without her sense of humor is criminal!

- DT

Shelly said...

Oh, Pearl, I do hope you feel better soon and they are able to unravel the cause of this. And, I guess I'm going to have to come up there so you can show me how to use a Neti Pot. I knew there shouldn't be water dripping from every orifice in my head-

Simply Suthern said...

The wife loves her neti pot. I've done done it a couple times. I aint wild about it.

I havent tried the Dr. Pepper version yet under controlled circumstances, only when someone makes me snort while drinking.

Kavi said...

Again, I had to look up what this Netti Pot was ! Very interesting ! I must say !

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

The first snort is always the worst. I'm referring to Neti Pots, of course.

mybabyjohn/Delores said...

I've been told more than once to try a netti pot but I just can't bring myself to do it.

Audubon Ron said...

I hope everything comes out alright. Not the nose. The blood test.

WrathofDawn said...

Have they checked you for benign paroxysmal positional vertigo?

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/vertigo/DS00534

Beach Bum said...

My wife brought home a neti pot not too long ago to help with her sinuses. Just because I do not want to sound like an ignorant Southern anymore than I have to I will not write the name of the device I thought it was at first glance. But its purpose deals with female satisfaction.

Joshua said...

I have almost no gag reflex (fellas, do NOT take note), but the mere thought of using a neti pot makes me want to hurl.

Mandy_Fish said...

I use Ocean Sinus which is like an automatic Neti Pot, loaded up in a spray can. I even discovered Ocean Sinus Baby and you know I am now torturing my snotty-nosed one-year-old with it now.

Lolamouse said...

My family thinks I'm crazy when I whip out my neti pot but I rarely get colds, and I when I do one coming on, I can usually nip it in the bud before it gets bad. They really are not difficult to use once you get over the "ewww" factor.

Joyful Things said...

I use a Neti pot and thank goodness no one has videos of the experience - saline water, snot and tears everywhere! But, have you tried reflexology? It may not cure what ails you but does it ever feel good! It's like the best foot rub in the world (except when/where they find the linked problem - its a bit painful.) Monthly cramps were eradicated, headaches are gone and if you find someone who is good at it can make you feel really quite human.

Cedar View said...

Yeck. Nevah gonna happen here. Pouring anything into one's nose is synonymous with Death. You'll not convince me that purposely trying to meet Death will make me feel better.

Sush said...

Love a good shower with a Neti pot in hand. You'll be feeling so spanking clean! Hope all goes well at the Dr's and you are your best health advocate.
Hugs~

Ian said...

You must not only purse your lips and look stern, you must also put your hands on your hips. That always works on me when I've run amok. Please get better soon, there are people who count on you.

ipenka said...

Never tried a Neti Pot yet.

For some reason it reminded me of that scene from Crocodile Dundee with the cocaine and allergies.

Oh well, hope you feel better soon!

jenny_o said...

You make it seem almost possible to use a neti pot without drowning ... maybe I need to get over that fear and give it a try too (chronic sinusitis).

Good luck at your doctor appointment. I do hope he realizes your Minnesota manners are not in any way synonymous with wimpishness!

Diane said...

Take Liza Bean with you! She gets things done!

Joanna Jenkins said...

Yikes Pearl, so sorry you're still sick and have to fight with your doc for attention. Sheesh. As for the neti pot-- I yiyi, I just cannot get my head around the idea of that. It kinda freaks me out.

Feel better soon. xo jj

Cloudia said...

hoping you feel silly again soon, Pearl!


Reiki?


Aloha from Waikiki;

Comfort Spiral



> < } } ( ° >

IndigoWrath said...

Hey Pearl! This sounds ghastly, and I'm not entirely sure I'm not having my leg pulled. A nasal teapot?! I feel nauseous if I get water up my nose when swimming. That said, can I, I mean can WE, get a picture of you looking stern? You know, so we... know what that looks like? Not for any seedy purpose, of course. Good lord no. Indigo x

nursemyra said...

I like what Vicus Scura said ;-)

Gigi said...

I've heard about the wonders of the Neti Pot but have yet to try it . . . mainly because I don't want the newspaper article to read "...and she was found dead in the bathroom; the victim of accidental drowning via a Neti Pot."

The Elephant's Child said...

Good luck with your doctor wrassling. Keep us in the loop (please).

powdergirl said...

Huh, I had something really deep to say, but then I read Douglas saying, "Nasal Douche", and immediately I had to start thinking of someone to use that on.
There's this guy at the tire shop...

who said...

I always thought it looked more like a gravy boat. In any resemblance, it can definitely help many chronic situations when one keeps in mind that whatever one puts into the "netipot" to rinse with is coming into contact with a mucus membrane so it is pertinent that the cleanliness of both the pot and the solution be very (in regards to cleanliness)

SherilinR said...

now i kind of want to go buy one of these things & use it even though i'm not sick. simply intrigued. i love crap that's not regular medicine or traditional healthcare.

W.C.Camp said...

Hope you feel better soon after all you must really be feeling bad if you stuck a tea pot up your nose!!! Ha Ha - you made me laugh! W.C.C.

HermanTurnip said...

Oh God, no. I thought those things were reserved for aged shut-ins and late night talk show host routines. Man, I get the shivers, the heebee-jeebee's, and even the jimmy leg when I think about those things.

Tempo said...

I've never heard of a neti pot..hardly surprising I guess considering it sounds like it slides under the bed and comes from...where the hell does it come from anyway?
Ive seen an old Aboriginal woman do something similar.. as a snot covered kid walked past her she grabbed it, lifted it to her face, covered the childs mouth and nose with her mouth and sort of inhaled. Putting the shocked kid down she turned and spat out half a mouthful of..er..snot!
I gagged...and didn't eat for the rest of the weekend.
Give that doctor hell!

Crystal Pistol said...

I am terribly concerned about the possibility of you losing your sense of humor. No laughing matter, that. You must be healed post haste!

I say you pitch a full blown fit. Those docs these days need a kick in the pants ofttimes in order to get the job done. Be a pants kicker, Pearl. I know you got it in ya. Good speed, my friend. :)

Crystal Pistol said...

*Godspeed

River said...

Forget looking stern, just refuse to leave until you get that blood test. Take a sleeping bag with you so the doc knows you're serious.

Pat said...

I wonder if the neti pot is like our inhaler where you make a mixture of something like Friars's Balsam, put towels over your head and
inhale the fumes.
Make the doctor sit up and take notice or I may have to come over and look after you.

Linda O'Connell said...

I gave myself a netti rinse, accidentally. I always have the shower head tilted a certain way. Suffice it to say, hubby was in the shower first. When I stepped in, the spray hit me square in the nostrils, and when I said "Ahhhh" in anticipation of a warm shower, I snuffled a snoot full. Reminded me of being held down by my mom at age three and being adminstered nose drops that made me snort a foul taste that lasted for hours. You can keep the Netti pot. I do hope you feel better and the blood tests come out fine. Avtually beware, ther emay be soem Dr. Pepper contamination.

R. Jacob said...

I guess the neti pot is replacing milk or soda as the normal nose clearing solution. So sad...

Russ said...

I 'discovered' neti pots a couple of years ago. Nearly drowned on my first attempt, but I could breathe. Now on the first sign of a head cold, I am flushing my sinuses.

Love it!

Bossy Betty said...

I would like a video, please.