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Sunday, May 8, 2011

What Do You Mean You Can't Take Him Back?

My last official purchase whilst still living at my parents’ house – and the mode by which I left it – was a 1968 Ford Falcon, an old car in great shape.

All it needed was speakers for its intriguing stereo system.

And when I refer to a stereo “system”, let us be clear that the “system” was a radio with a built-in cassette player.

I wasted no time in getting two used speakers at a garage sale.

For two dollars, you just knew they had to be good!

I ran the wires from the radio to the speakers in the back and fell asleep that night with dreams of how I would make this car really cool, maybe dropping the chassis, having my name etched into the glass on the driver’s side window, buying a metal clip with a big feather attached to it for a key chain and similar necessary and perfectly legal things.

When I awoke, however, and went out to drive my new car to my new job, I could not help but notice the number of things that had accumulated in my car overnight.

Sand. Lots of sand. A pair of swim fins. Several empty Budweiser beer cans. A man’s swim trunks. A woman’s bikini top but no bottom.

The mind. She boggles.

There was a note on the front seat from my brother. He is one year younger than I and has been the figurative elbow in my ribs since they brought him home from the hospital. Attached to the note was a single dollar bill.

“Hey, Squirrel. Nice car. Ha ha. Nice stereo. You should get another set of used, blown speakers and double your sound quality! Ha ha. Here’s a dollar for you. Buy yourself some gas. Ha ha ha. Your loving brother, Kevin.”

My brother.

He's a funny guy.

28 comments:

Blissed-Out Grandma said...

Clearly he did not appreciate your car's beauty and coolness. Hmm, I'm glad I didn't buy a car until after I moved away from home and my four younger brothers. Cheers!

Bossy Betty said...

Ah, brothers! Always there for you!

Sioux said...

I had a Falcon...It was a manual and shifted on the steering column, if I'm remembering correctly.

Think of how much gas your bothersome brother's dollar would buy today...a few drops?

jabblog said...

No matter what, your first car remains in the memory.

Pat said...

My first car was a Triumph Spitfire. It was stolen and dumped in a field minus its top half. When the police-man came to tell me he laughed and I cried.

GYPSYWOMAN said...

oh, dear, we may be related! that sounds just like my little brother! perhaps we shared him in another life?! love your car story! i had a visual of the entire night's escapade!

hocam said...

My first car was a Citroen Dyane. My brother got down to look underneath it. When asked he said he was looking for the blades....it was only fit to mow the lawn in his opinion!

Eva Gallant said...

My first husband had a blue and white Ford Falcon when we met. The blue matched his eyes. I was blinded by love!

C... said...

Siblings huh?

Oilfield Trash said...

This story was hilarious.

jenny_o said...

Funny how he had enough money to buy drinks but not enough to put a decent bit of gas in the tank! And did he just TAKE it without asking? Heinous!!

Douglas said...

My ex-wife had a Falcon when we met. A 1967 2-door model, I believe. When we married, she left it with her brother when we moved to Florida. Her brother weighed on the far side of 400 lbs. A little over a year later, we saw the Falcon again. The front (bench) seat was broken and barely held in place by the two rear mountings. It "reclined"... And the shocks and springs on the left (driver's) side were no longer effective. We didn't ask for it back.

Gigi said...

Little brothers are a bane to their older sisters - surely we could get a refund?

Belle said...

Great story! He reminds me of my grandsons who used to take their Mom's car when they didn't even have a license.

Cheeseboy said...

I've got to get me some of those speakers! And a cool brother!

laughingmom said...

At least he left you the dollar!Very funny, Pearl. Happy Mother's Day!!

Doubting Thomas said...

According to my math he still owed you another dollar for the speakers. I would have taken it out of him with a Louisville Slugger. Probably one of many reasons why my mom is glad I only had little sisters ;)

IWASNTBLOGGEDYESTERDAY said...

LOL too funny.I had a 68 morris mini that I "dressed up" too . A dollar lol in the 70's that was a quarter tank though :)

Daisy said...

My first car was a red and white Falcon. Fortunately, no little brother came with it!

Susan in the Boonies said...

Oh, gosh. That would be butt kickin' time in Tennessee. Seriously!

vanilla said...

yeah, well some of us guys had little sisters, too.

(Yours is a great story!)

HermanTurnip said...

Your brother was wearing a bikini top? Wild!

rental mobil jakarta said...

Very nice, thanks for sharing.

Canada said...

What you’re saying is completely true. I know that everybody must say the same thing, but I just think that you put it in a way that everyone can understand. I also love the images you put in here. They fit so well with what you’re trying to say. I’m sure you’ll reach so many people with what you’ve got to say.

Carolyn said...

Your first car has a sentimental value. Great story!

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Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I'm wondering how you repaid his generosity!

On My Soapbox said...

Your '68 had a cassette player? Damn. My '73 Mercury only got AM radio....

Audubon Ron said...

Funny. I have a car story too coming soon to a town near you. I mentioned this post in it b/c I was inspired to write it by someone who mentioned your post in her blog. maybe this will go viral. On second thought...