I've been included in a Minnesota anthology "Under Purple Skies", now available on Amazon!

My second chapbook, "The Second Book of Pearl: The Cats" is now available as either a paper chapbook or as a downloadable item. See below for the Pay Pal link or click on its cover just to the right of the newest blog post to download to your Kindle, iPad, or Nook. Just $3.99 for inspired tales of gin, gambling addiction and inter-feline betrayal.

My first chapbook, I Was Raised to be A Lert is in its third printing and is available both via the PayPal link below and on smashwords! Order one? Download one? It's all for you, baby!

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Just Try It: Grunting Makes It Easier

I was hoisting my body out of a chair the other day…

UH!

You know how it is.  You’re terribly tired, your muscles grumbling about how you don’t take them out for months and then you expect some sort of performance -- and now you're all sore and achy, aren't you?

UH!

It's got me thinking.

Today’s topic de jour for today – redundancy being a topic for another time – is grunting.

Not enough is being said about grunting; and frankly, I’m appalled. Look at all grunting has given us.

1. It’s a ridiculously descriptive word, an Archie Bunkeresque word that pretty much declares itself without any help from you.
2. Look at it. Grunt. If you had to come up with a word to describe the act of grunting, it practically throws itself at you.
3. It’s very difficult to misspell the word “grunt”. There’s just no other way to spell it, and I like that in a word.
4. It’s also, at least on the east coast of the U.S., a crumbly-topping-and-fruit cake dealio. Don’t let the name fool you. Trust me. Order the Blueberry Grunt.

I could go on – and probably will! I’m heading to yoga with Amy and after 90 minutes of heated exertion, I’ll bet I’ll think of more to say on the topic of grunting.

And there you have it, a perfectly Sunday kind of post.

Minimum effort.

Maximum grunting.

28 comments:

mamahasspoken said...

Ah but come tomorrow, you will be full of more grunts thanks to yoga's ablility to find muscles you never knew you had ;o)

Rosaria Williams said...

Yeah, great Sunday topic, all right. Especially since most are stuck inside and trying to unkink these sore muscles. Happy Time at Yoga.

furiousBall said...

you know, by the title, I was so hoping this was going to be about pooping

VEG said...

It also describes adequately the noise I made this morning when I realized it was Sunday yet I had to get up and come in to the office. Grrrrrrunt. However I now have coffee. Grunting is on intermission.

Simply Suthern said...

I tend to grunt more now than I used too.

now I have to get up out of my chair. I'll be grunting then too.

Unknown said...

Grunting, you are right does not get the glory it should. Grunting is what I did when the dog demand I get up early on my last day to sleep in this weekend. Grunting is what I did when I saw there were no more clean knives to make my toast.

Unknown said...

The grunts become more frequent as one ages, believe me!

SparkleFarkel said...

Good luck with that yoga/exercise thing you and Amy got going. I, on the otherhand and at all costs, avoid breaking a sweat in such a fashion, as I regard it to be grunt work: work that is menial and thankless. LOL!

Symdaddy said...

There's only one thing I grunt for!

Madame DeFarge said...

I could be a tennis player for the grunting I do. Sometimes comes out as a squeak, but a girl has to start somewhere.

Leenie said...

I SO hate it when I hear myself making noises like an old person. Like grunting myself out of a chair. (man! that sounded just like gramps!) Keep with the yoga where grunting goes with gasping and groaning and not gramps. Congrats on all the days with out the nicotine sticks.

Lo said...

Oy......wait till you are 83....then you'll know something about grunting.

Unnnnnnph! Great post.

Douglas said...

"Grunt" is a wonderful word. It is one of the few that actually sounds like what it means. Until you meet a Marine (enlisted) serviceman... Also called a "grunt" (probably because that is the sound they most often make that can be repeated in mixed company).

jenny_o said...

Great post! Now I am reverently waiting for one on "sighing". That happens more as we age, too. Not necessarily as a comment on life; sometimes we just need more air. Please consider giving "sighing" the Pearl Treatment . . .

Tracy said...

Pearl,
Oh my goodness, this took me back to when I was trying out for cheerleading in an auditorium full of judges; I'm sure there weren't that many but it certainly felt like it.
Anyway, We had to do jumps off of a mini-tramp and I was high in the air, my legs split wide, and as soon as I landed a huge 'GRUNT' came out of my mouth...Well at 14 I was totally mortified!

Indigo Roth said...

Cherie, je grunt aussi!

Bossy Betty said...

I can tell when anyone in our office wing sits down by all the grunting!

Jhon Baker said...

humph, grunt grunt, ahhhh - nice.

Oilfield Trash said...

I am pretty sure someone has misspelled grunt before.

lisahgolden said...

That is the sound that I make in the morning. A lot. When I'm cleaning the cat box, making the bed, working the kinks out of my back.

The sad part is that the word has been ruined for me. My cousins used the word grunt as a euphemism for poop when we were kids.

Joanna Jenkins said...

SOunds like my kind of Sunday, Pearl.
Have a great week, jj

Unknown said...

I'm very audible with my grunts and as I get older, they come more frequently.

Holly said...

I'm planning on incorporating the word "grunt" into my vocabulary on a daily basis now. I have a new found appreciation for it.

Grant said...

It's also a term for a foot soldier. And incredibly close to my name.

the walking man said...

I like to break wind when I grunt rising from the chair--it seems to give me a little extra boost for the effort.

Anonymous said...

The Williams Sisters ruined grunting for me.

Casey Freeland said...

Yeah, I remember when my dad would moan and grunt I thought, "I will never, ever do that." Now I'm 42 and I have lost that bet.

Poor dad.

Cheers,

Casey

Unknown said...

Did you see the movie Lonesome Dove? Do you remember Gus's pigs? Now those bad boys could grunt.

(If you didn't watch Lonesome Dove...you really should.)