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Friday, December 24, 2010

Now With More Facial-Hairs Observance!

I have a friend who can be relied upon to be honest with herself.

“I’ve got a feeling,” she said recently, rubbing her chin with the ends of her fingers, her eyes glazed and staring into the distance.

“About?”

“Hairs. I’m going to be sprouting hairs somewhere on my face, and soon. I can just tell.”

“What, you get a tingly feeling, or what?”

“Something like that,” she said. “Ya weirdo.”

“You’re the one predicting hair growth,” I observed.

“Hmm,” she said, as if to concede a point. “I’ve got a theory.”

I waited. Mary’s theories are the stuff of legend.

“Hair Fairies.”

“Excuse me?”

“Hair Fairies,” she repeated. Her fingers ceased their exploratory trek across her chin. “Like the opposite of a Tooth Fairy. See, she doesn’t show up to take hairs away, she stops by to drop them off.”

“On your face.”

“And yours,” she said.

I felt my chin. “I don’t feel any,” I said.

“Give it time," she said thoughtfully. "The Hair Fairy usually comes at night, while you're sleeping.” She paused. “We should make a pact.”

I waited.

She waited.

I sighed. “OK. A pact. Regarding?”

“Stray hairs. If you see any on me, you’ll tell me, just like the spinach-on-the-teeth thing. And if I see any on you, I’ll tell you. Deal?”

Who can pass up that kind of deal?


We'll just add that to my resume.

29 comments:

Gigi said...

Now THAT is a true friend! Here's hoping the Hair Fairy doesn't make any deposits anytime soon!

Sarah said...

My best girlfriends are all in the "No White Lies" pact.

If your outfit is ugly, they will tell you. If your friend got a new haircut and it's awful, you will tell her.

It hasn't always been a conflict-free time, but at least you always knew where you stood with the gals.

Jinksy said...

Thanks for the warning - but too late! She found me years ago! LOL :) My eyebrow tweezers have been working overtime ever since...

Carrie Lynne said...

I have made a promise to a friend if we are ever hospitalized or otherwise unable to take care of our personal-needs that the other one would weld the tweezers for us. She has also promised to get rid of any compromising items that could be found lurking in my bed-stand drawer.

Karen said...

I got into my 40's and grew a goat beard. I tweeze practically daily. I would wax, but considering my personal klutz factor, I fear that I would end up with no hair at all on my enire head and facial region were I to heat up the wax and start slathering.

Jhon Baker said...

A stray hair pact? who could do without one?

Jhon Baker said...

Everyone needs a stray hair pact. How can you have lived this long without one?

Eva Gallant said...

I think you are safe...that hair fairy has been hanging out at my house for the last couple of years!

Jenn Jilks said...

I'd like to say that I have no idea what you're talking about in this post...

:-)

Thanks for visiting.

lgsquirrel said...

This Hair Fairy would be very popular with bald men.

Oilfield Trash said...

That is hilarious. Merry Christmas.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

I'd have to say I've never heard of this pact. You are nothing if not unique. It's a good resolution for the new year.
Happy holidays.
xoRobyn

Flea said...

It's not a fairy. It's an elf. And it showed up when I hit puberty. :(

Cheeseboy said...

I think the hair fairies are a little rough on me. They have a thing for my back. My wife would prefer if they would leave me alone.

Kevin Musgrove said...

I'll have something to say about the Hair Fairy's sense of direction when I see them!

Have a good Chrimbo, Pearl!

a Broad said...

I wish I had a friend like that .. I could probably have whiskers down to my chest and my husband wouldn't mention it ..

Tempo said...

I got a hell of a thrashing from the hair fairy back when I was about 15...and I've had the beard since then. I cant even remember what I look like under all this hair and there are no pics

The Retired One said...

Too late for me!!! I have them already. GROAN...
Men have it SOOOOO easy!!!

Leah said...

Yup. I have this pact with my sister. It's an Unbreakable Vow.

vanilla said...

TRO thinks men have it easy? From puberty to the grave with the every-day shave thing? Please.

Merry Christmas!

gayle said...

That's what friends are for!

Sioux Roslawski said...

Good friends are willing to say brutal things to us. Like, "Nice mustache, ma'am." Or, "That's a great unibrow you've got goin' on."

24 Corners said...

Oh Pearl...thank you for the Christmas Eve giggles...it's been too long! Hope you found the 'nice' shirt and the required 'heavy' jewelry...and no hair fairy visits!
Congrats on your book...it's about time your writing has paper attached to it! Very exciting!

Merry Christmas dear...and many blessings for the New Year!!
xo J~

Symdaddy said...

People have been telling me I have a hairy face for years!

Lisa said...

I've been visited by the Hair Faerie! And the only time I ever notice its leavings is when I'm in the car checking myself out in the visor mirror.

Kay Dennison said...

I hope y'all have a blessed and joyous Christmas!!!

Simply Suthern said...

WHo could ask for more?

Betty B said...

Ha that is the kind of friend you need in your life! I have a similarish pact regarding bats in the cave!
http://talesfromthemorningafterx.blogspot.com

Pat Tillett said...

One day I was shocked to notice that hair had started growing my ears! NOBODY TOLD ME...
That was the day, I started lecturing everyone I know about "being a friend."