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Wednesday, November 24, 2010

The Bus is Mine

Today is the day before a two-day holiday here in the U.S. of A; and while I, personally, am scheduled to work five days a week until three days after my death, it appears, by the look of the bus, that everyone else has opted to tack on to the four-day weekend by taking today off as well.

I try not to be bitter.

I have lumbered on to the bus this morning (my outerwear being several layers deep) to discover that I am only the fourth person to enjoy the stress-free ride that is public transport.

The fourth!

Not only do I have my own seat, but there’s room for a parlor, a large dog and a walk-in humidor.

Finally. A walk-in humidor...

There are precious few amenities on a bus, as I'm sure you're aware; but now that I’ve got room to expand a little, I’m quite excited about the ride to yoga tonight and have big plans.

What do you think? We knock out the whole front area. I want to see wheel-to-wheel carpeting, curtains, maybe a glass roof, just to give it a more expansive feel.

On-site seated massage!

Dinner mints on every seat!

Complimentary elbow bleaching!

It’s ridiculous how keyed up I get about the end of a work day just before a holiday.

And you just know the ride to yoga Monday night is gonna be sweet.

27 comments:

Sarah said...

I feel your pain Pearl...but it could be worse! After all, you could be like me and get tomorrow of, but have to work Friday. Oh, the inhumanity!

Hope you have a happy Thanksgiving and that your turkey is delicious & moist, your green bean hotdish warm & tasty, your stuffing soft and flavorful, your canned cranberries appropriately ridged, and your pie crusts are flaky and sweet.

Simply Suthern said...

Dance floor and a mirror ball would be a nice addition. Pictures of Liza Bean and Dolly on the walls would add that homey touch. An upper deck might even be desirable while you are at it. Hope yours is a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Georgina Dollface said...

And toilet paper folded into a point in the WC at the back of the bus! There's gotta be an upside to working when everyone else is eating and shopping, right? Have a lovely, luxurious commute this week. - G

Eva Gallant said...

Pearl, you are so funny! Have a great Thanksgiving!

Oilfield Trash said...

I think you just found your thing to be thankful for this thanksgiving.

Grant said...

Sounds similar to my setup. Traffic is light, the parking lot is less full, but my department is fully staffed. People who submitted vacation were rudely yanked back at the last minute by our manager, who is not here.

Pearl said...

Everyone is so sweet today!

:-)

The interesting thing, of course, about this particular Thanksgiving is that we are expecting something of a blizzard and unreasonably cold temperatures (fairly rare for this time of year), which means that I may not make it up to my parents' house, lovely people who make a mean bird.

In the newspeak that is FaceBook, I UNLIKE this.

Camille said...

Happy Thanksgiving Pearl. Good grief - a blizzard heading your way? That means we'll probably get all the residual stuff you didn't want or need dumped over here on the right hand side of the country in a day or so. Thanks. I better stockpile more bird. Hope you make it to your parents tomorrow. Be sure to wear a hat.

Tay Talk said...

I think I would be bitter. Actually I'm kinda bitter being at work today. Why can't I have today off? Children are out of school, I should be too.

However we must be positive right? Right.

I'm kinda with Simply Suthern...dance floor all the way. Or perhaps you crank up the heat and have a portable yoga studio??? EH?? You would get use to the frequent pot hole hit. Work it into the practice :)

Have a great Thanksgiving!

Rezden said...

Driving to work today was insane. Took me 15 mins when it usually take 30 (15 of it just sitting in traffic). Was pretty great. :)

Kay Dennison said...

Enjoy your space!!!!

Leenie said...

Yes, sweet!

lesinfin said...

Happy Thanksgiving, Pearl! I'd be excited about that walk-in humidor too!
xoxo

bruce said...

Pearl-
sorry you are gonna not see the family...

mebbe instead of the bus upgrades, invest in snow machine.. i dunno, justa thought...

happy and safe thanksgiving!!!

bruce
bruceejohnsonjadip.blogspot.com
unfilteredstupidityabounds.blogspot.com

Sweet Cheeks said...

Pearly Girly~
Have a lovely Thanksgiving, my friend! =]

p.s.
I've been meaning to talk to Facebook...shouldn't it be Dislike, rather than Unlike? Am I just being nitpicky?

Tony Spunk said...

Man, you wouldn't want to take the bus in Vegas unless you enjoy conversing with people with missing limbs and homicidal intent, or drunks who lost their life savings at the casinos. Come to think of it maybe you would? You'd sure get some good bus stories there. Although you seem to have plenty out there in the northern states as it is.

Dr. Cynicism said...

Hell, I say there should be a little yoga section on the bus!

Gigi said...

I also schlepped myself in to work today; where I was just about the only person in the building. Wondered why I bothered to show up.

Jhon Baker said...

going back to normal transit may be painful. Try not to dwell on the elbow room you have now as it will soon be taken up by someones unbleached elbow or worse.

Irish Gumbo said...

I'm blessed to have tomorrow and Friday off, which gives me plenty of time to make a big pot of gumbo! The red carpet is out for you, if you decide you'd like to visit the warmer climes of Baltimore!

Jerry said...

I drove in to work this morning on pretty empty freeways...almost enjoyed going to work. We left work early at 2:00 -- and the freeway was packed. Where did they come from?

I rode the bus to work for five years..and the thing that drove me insane was all of the inane cell phone conversations.

Lisa said...

I would totally ride your bus!

becca said...

have a happy thanksgiving

SherilinR said...

my husband & i both have to work tomorrow. foolishness, pure foolishness.
i hope you get to go see your fam and eat their mean bird.
complimentary elbow bleaching? does this exist?

Hilary said...

Why even go? It sounds like there's plenty of downward dogspace on the bus.

I hope you and yours have a Happy Thanksgiving.

Blissed-Out Grandma said...

Only half the people in my department worked today. And they couldn't get much done because at least half the people they tried to contact were not in their offices, either. Gotta love it. Hope you get to see your family!

Windsmoke. said...

So you're not packed in like a sardine, plenty of elbow room and space stretch your arms and legs, swing a cat 360 degrees without knocking someone out.