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Friday, May 28, 2010

The Bride Wore a Lovely Diamond-Studded Collar

Ladies and gentlemen, cats and kittens, we come once again to the highlight of any working person’s week: Friday.

Friday? I can do it on my head – especially in light of the looming three-day weekend.

But what’s that you say? If only we had some inkling of what was before us? If only we knew how to prepare for it, whether or not there be a need for sensible shoes or a full box of Kleenex?

But we do! Come closer. You hear that? It’s my iPod. O shuffling iPod, auditory accompaniment to the morning commute, provider of grooves both ridiculous and sublime and of egos un-reined, what is in our immediate future?

Heavy Cross by Gossip
Woodstock by Crosby Stills Nash and Young
Halfway Home by TV on the Radio*
Neighbors by Gnarls Barkley
Valerie by Amy Winehouse (with Mark Ronson)
Psychotic Reaction by The Count Five
Keep the Car Running by Arcade Fire

Well I asked for it, didn’t I? Songs of longing and hope, na├»vete and pain.

I wonder if partying would help?

At any rate, it seems there’s been a lot on my mind of late. Frankly, I’m a seeker of patterns. Seems to me that if I could just find the pattern that I would know what to expect. The pattern I’ve been seeing lately, however, leaves me shaking my head and reaching for sturdy walls.


For the last two days, I’ve shared some bits about Liza Bean Bitey (of the Minneapolis Biteys) and Dolly Gee Squeakers (formerly of the Humane Society Squeakers).

Harmless fluff, yes? Silly meanderings of an untethered mind, no?

I got off the bus yesterday, ran into my friend Steve on the sidewalk, and we walked up the steps and into the front porch to be met by the through-the-screen-door-into-the-living-room view of the downstairs renter waltzing.

And I swear this is true: his partner was his cat.

Truth be told, they were a handsome couple, Matt and Abner (Abner’s the cat), cutting a rug on the dance floor of their living room. I nudged Steve in the ribs and pointed with my nose as Matt held Abner tight, and then dipped him, in three-four time.

The cat struggled to remain dignified.

Steve and I struggled as well.

It was a valiant struggle, but one lost in the end, as Matt finished the dance with a flourish and then held Abner up, under his fuzzy little armpits, raised him into the air and declared, “You dance divinely. Yes you do! Yes you do!"

I, of course, said nothing; and Steve and I took the door next to the door that led to man-on-cat dancing and walked up the flight of steps that led to my place.

Some behavior defies patterns.

And I’m glad.

*If I were to recommend a new band for your listening scrutiny, it would be TV on the Radio. If I were NOT to recommend a new band, I would keep my mouth shut.
But you know me.


Anonymous said...

I don't think I could have kept my composure. I would have fell out laughing on the porch and ended up embarassing the poor kitty! Heck with Matt. He shouldn't dip a man-cat! Leave him with SOME dignity.

savannah said...

what an image, sugar! and thanks for the music tip. have a grand weekend. xoxoxo

Anonymous said...

I'm jealous. My cats won't dance with me anymore. In fairness to them, I did step on a few paws during our Square Dancing lessons.

What a bunch of grudge holders.

**I was thinking all of your songs hint at rebellion...

a Broad said...

My little cat out-purred the music if I picked him up and waltzed around with him. I miss him ...

Pup on the other hand .... won't actually waltz with me but he does love it when I sing... which leads to much rolling around and petting and snuggling.

Keep a camera on hand for the next sighting of man-on cat waltzing!

furiousBall said...

I was just listening to Oh My God by Lily Allen from that same Mark Ronson CD.

Jocelyn said...

Guess who's been needing some new music to listen to? The same me who's about to google some Tv on the Radio.

Oh, and I believe you had stumbled onto the set of the newest David Lynch movie there.

Tail-Kinker said...

My Alabama Mae loves to dance with me as well. This makes me feel slightly better, as now I have proof that there are other people out there torturing...I mean dancing...with their cats.

Alabama Mae also plays some mean Rock Band on Xbox 360.

We go easy on her though, since she had a forced hysterectomy early in life (before she met us) and was never able to have children. This fact has haunted her and at times during the day, she will find her psuedo-kitty (a small stuffed animal kitten) pick it up in her mouth, and proceed down the stairs one at a time from the bedroom, yowling the entire way.

It's her way of mourning. Do Liza Bean or Dolly regret not having any kitteh's of their own?

Simply Suthern said...

I have tried liking the wifes cats. I even feed the buggars, carry out their litter, soiled and stinky from the food and water I provide. And yet they taunt and tease and toss their kibbles about. Last night they stole chicken from my stir-fry. I didn't even know they had siamese in them. So, if ya think ya see me waltzing with a cat, ya might just re-check my hand positions. They wont be under the armpits. Give me back my porkchop.

The Retired One said...

I say you recruit them on Dancing of the Stars....!!!! You can be an agent, Pearl..I know you'd be a damn good one!!!

Douglas said...

Who waltzes anymore? Really.

Anything Fits A Naked Man said...

I confess, I dance with my Jack Russell Terrier!

She hates it. Barks and bares her teeth and whines. Then, she just gives up. But seriously, how can you NOT get up and cut a rug with your dog when the Stray Cat's "Rock This Town" comes on? Really!!

dirt clustit said...

oh, well i guess I mean if wasn't there hmmm but wouldn't because if shouldn't you maybe if
if only it had it been yesterday
*scratches head* If you were to NOT recommend a new band?

I guess I should show you the pictures, right now I am running late so after 6 I will though. So that I don't leave you hanging I will say that Perkins was right, it hadn't been that bright for a century and a third, clouds rolled in but it never covered it up.

I unfortunately have a large cut to the side of my right eye. He pretty much missed completely but hand a ring on his pinky that grazed the side of my face. I was completely confused and totally caught off guard (I don't even know women who wear pinky rings like that).

then I realized I must have walked in on a little opportunity shopping (when I was a hoodlum we called it dashboard shopping) the ring wasn't a pinky ring, it was just too small for him so he put it on the finger it fit.

it was quite the full moon last night. I will post about it when I get home

The mad woman behind the blog said...

My cats prefer the samba. Though we haven't tried a polka, don't know if I'm up for it. Though my husband't cat would probably prefer the waltz. Is Matt looking for more partners?

WrathofDawn said...

I fuzzy heart Matt.

Cheeseboy said...

Did you see that Arcade Fire has a new album coming out very soon? I couldn't be more happy about it.

Already LOVE TV on the Radio. You have supreme taste in music. No wonder I like this blog so much.

Anonymous said...

Umm, hello. I think you left out what the cat was wearing? C'mon! And what color were the cat's toe-nails?

Tempo said...

Its funny how our aminal friends become part of the family...or is it that we become part of theirs?!

CatLadyLarew said...

I'm a little worried about Matt...