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Sunday, September 6, 2009

Things That Are Found At The Beach for A Thousand, Alex

I tend to look around a lot.

Some call it nosey. I call it observant.

Because of this, I find a lot of things.

Mostly coins.

I once found, in a fit of cleaning, a diamond and garnet ring. It may have been someone first wife's. It may have not been. But it was buried in a pile of left-behiond-style things in a corner of the basement, and I considered it "booty".

The next time we went out for drinks, I left it for the waitress as a tip.

But that's not the most memorable thing I've found.

It was 1986, and my friend Christy was living in Miami. Miami in the 80s was very much like the set of "Scarface": the buildings were the color of candy; the clothes were tiny, fluorescent bits; the sun was bright; and everyone was tanned to a the-turkey's-done brown-ness.

I had gone to visit her on a whim, a weekend of sun, water, dancing; and we found ourselves in a rented Mustang convertible (red, of course) on a very long bridge over a wide expanse of water on our way to Key West. We were branching out.

To be young and strong and confident? Oh, we were something.

One afternoon, walking the beaches, we came across a large plastic-wrapped bale. It had washed up into whatever weeds things wash up into in that part of the world, bundles and bundles of plastic-bound bundles tied together, careful packages...

"Oh God oh God oh God," Christy moaned. "They're gonna find us in plastic bags washed up on beaches, too." She threw her hands up in the air. "Stepping away! Stepping away!"

"What are you talking about?" I said.

"That's coke! That's hundreds of thousands of dollars right there! They bring it in on boats, sometimes they have to dump it early and it washes ashore! Oh God!" She began walking toward the car.

"We're going back to Miami, where it's safe!"

Well hold on there! Coke? Cocaine? All of that is cocaine?! Wow! Heady visions of the money that you could make if you just knew the right people in 5, 4, 3...

No, not really.

We went back to Miami. We did not make hundreds of thousands of dollars -- or go to prison.

A happy ending.


And that was the most memorable thing I ever found.

23 comments:

powdergirl said...

I've found 3 wedding bands at the end of my driveway, I think my little stretch of road must be were people go to say " so long, sucker". I found one just yesterday, too, funny you should mention that...

And my BF found a VERY EXPENSIVE Rolex on the beach on Maui last January.

But no bundles cocaine. That would just scream "Run" to me.

Glad you managed to find an appropriate use for your found ring, : )

otin said...

OK, this is a true story:

I lived at the Jersey shore with my Dad, and my Brother and step brother came to visit for the weekend.(They were younger, and lived with my mother) JR, my red headed step brother(NO lying here), wanted to go to the beach! It was 28 degrees, in late november. Being kids, we walked to the beach. All along the beach, he kept picking up things and asking me what they were. Shells, and whatever else had washed up. He picked up a big hunk of porous material and asked what it was. My brother looked at him and said, "Frozen dog shit, you idiot"! LOL!

kimber p said...

my partner is like a human metal detector, she's found rings, watches, a 14k gold bracelet (which she promptly handed to me..lol) and she finds coins, and she's the only person I've ever met who can walk into a yard and within 5 minutes has found a 4 leaf clover! Not exaggerating at all--she's lucky that way...

Mr London Street said...

Lovely. I could almost smell the shoulder pads in this post.

Douglas said...

I lost myself on a beach once. Does that count?

Suzy said...

I lost an 18 carat gold pinking ring with the initial O on it (my mothers) at Lake Ronkokkomen (sp) in NY state. Be on the lookout.

Susan said...

I found an arrowhead once. Actually it was a piece of shale and I shaped it into an arrow. I want to find gold or diamonds...or something to kill the mildew in my shower.

darsden said...

I found a very large object attached to me... and it is still there Laughing My Large Object off...

@eloh said...

How about a hog with a giant shark bite.

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

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www.speakingfromthecrib.com

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

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powdergirl said...

Darsden,
You kill me ! LMAO

C. Andres Alderete said...

I lost a bale of cocaine in 1986. What a small world.

Kate Coveny Hood said...

That Christy is a smart cookie. She's the one who would hear the demon voice in the haunted house warning her to leave and NOT go to "investigate" what it was - within seconds, she'd be well on her way back to Miami.

Kavi said...

Oh you do find things ! Dont you !! And observant...!

:)

And diamond ring as a tip ! I hope she was observant enough.

Joanna Jenkins said...

"...I left it for the waitress as a tip."
That is priceless :-)
xo

Jocelyn said...

I know you're huge funny and all, Pearl. Cuz you make me snertle all the time.

But I can't help the sads I'm feeling right now for the waitress who didn't get the brick of coke that night. Kind of selfish of you, si?

af1blog said...

When much younger I had a few drinks one night with the lads and eventually found myself on a beach with a girl. Unfortunately, I returned home later and lost myself again.

Jeanne said...

I once found a baggie of marijuana with a sizable roll of bills in the bag outside a fast food restaurant. I hadn't much more than picked it up off the asphalt when a guy in a wife-beater t-shirt came high-tailing it out of the restaurant, shouting, "Give me that! It's mine!"

Chill, dude. Who wants your grody old stash anyway?

giantspeckledchihuahua said...

When I lived on the Cape, I walked the beach every morning hoping/looking for treasure. A beautiful sunrise was what I got. What I wouldn't give to be on that beach every morning, watching the sunrise.

IB said...

I find you entertaining as hell. Does that count?

The Jules said...

I once found that if you pick it, it doesn't get better.

Christy said...

Hey that's me! The one who still has a bunch of stuff at your loft. I won't mention that I need to clean it also. When & if I find a decent full time job we should get some friends together go to Miami in the dead of winter. We can stay at my house for free! Even has a pool woo hoo! We'd have a blast. Thanks for everything. I miss kicking apples and sitting in your backyard talking:( Great blog. They still have my car!