Having been forced, merely from a pocketbook standpoint, to give up a number of things I enjoyed intermittently, I now realize why the rich seem to look better for longer.
Except, of course, if they’ve had Botox, implants of almost any sort, or cosmetic surgery where something’s been stuffed, stretched, or hoisted. Then they just look freaky and serve as entertaining warnings to us all.
No, my friends. I refer specifically to the relaxing benefits of massages, facials, pedicures.
These things should be accessible to the masses, should they not?
And this is why I’m organizing a labor swap.
Hear me out!
While there are essential oils, scents, scrubs, and specially designed chairs and tables for these sorts of things, surely we could arrange for some sort of swap wherein one person makes a lovely roast in exchange for having their feet buffed, their nails painted?
What’s that? Why yes, I’m serious!
Because you know what we have on our hands, folks? Look around you. Look closely. You know what I see?
Frowns. Stooped backs. Rough feet. And perhaps the worst of all: Recession brows.
There are some things you just don’t care to do yourself.
Why, surely one can pluck one’s own eyebrows, you say!
Surely one can, I say, if one wants to end up drawing them in later in life with a special pencil or one doesn’t mind looking surprised for a couple months. And don’t call me Shirley!
I don’t know. It’s just an idea I’m toying with.
And rest assured this isn’t the only idea I have.
I’m full of ‘em.
8 hours ago