I've contributed to perhaps the best humor compilation I've ever read. Available now on Amazon!

My second chapbook, "The Second Book of Pearl: The Cats" is now available as either a paper chapbook or as a downloadable item. See below for the Pay Pal link or click on its cover just to the right of the newest blog post to download to your Kindle, iPad, or Nook. Just $3.99 for inspired tales of gin, gambling addiction and inter-feline betrayal.

My first chapbook, I Was Raised to be A Lert is in its third printing and is available both via the PayPal link below and on smashwords! Order one? Download one? It's all for you, baby!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

What To Wear, What To Wear...

It’s Thursday. You knew that. But were you aware that since my employer’s implementation of the four-day workweek that in addition to Thursday it is also my Friday?

Fascinating, iddin it?

As always, I’ll be pre-judging my weekend based on the songs on the morning’s commute.

So what does the iPod have to say?

Woodstock by Crosby Stills Nash & Young
Hem of Your Garment by Cake
Wilderness by Sleater-Kinney
Never Been to Spain by Three Dog Night
Cobrastyle by Teddybears
Charmer by Kings of Leon
The Hardest Button to Button by The White Stripes

Well, I think that’s pretty clear, don’t you? No point in beating it into the ground…


Ah. Friday. Fridays are, generally speaking, “casual day” in the United States, and because it will be reason to wear my new jeans – and because I have been sitting here almost two hours wracking my brain for a subject on which to blogify – I find myself thinking about my wardrobe.

I dress for work. As opposed to, say, going to work naked – something HR emphatically frowns on. Hey – I’ve read the employee manual. Shipping can send out all the “Naked Friday” e-mails it wants.

I’m not falling for that again.

I’ve been working since the day of the typewriter and Wite-Out, since computers were referred to as “CRT”s.

In other words, a long time.

I admit I can have some pretty outmoded ideas on proper work attire.

For instance, while I no longer wear nylons in the summer (that is so 80s), I still wear heels, skirts, snappy little jackets and flowers in my hair.

OK. I don’t really wear flowers in my hair, but someone did on the bus today.

He looked very jaunty.

Things have definitely gotten casual since I first began trading my time for money, however, and I’m not sure it’s a good thing.

The normalization of the thong, for example. I can see it – as can everyone else – because those pants are only pretending to cover your ass. Lady, those pants don’t care about you -- and what they've done to me? I'll be thinking of slingshots for the rest of the day.

Flip-flops – which, by the way, were known as “thongs” in my youth – also strike me as a tad too relaxed for corporate work, although the "thok thok thok" of someone in a pair of flip-flops coming down the hall also serves as a warning, so it's kind of a give-and-take situation there.

But the brilliantly blue bra and white shirt? Some of the men are walking into filing cabinets. Me? Again with the slingshots.

I don’t know. Times change, appropriate dress changes.

No need to go back to the scintillation of a glimpse of a woman’s ankle, but can we keep the butt cracks at a minimum at work?

I think that's fair.


IB said...

No worries ladies: HR has informed we men that we are not to look at women in "that way" no matter how you are dressed. So, let your thong-flags fly; you'll get no harassment from us.

Not The Rockefellers said...

I remember CRT's ( and I thought you were going to go somewhere with the wite-out on the CRT screen! LOL)
And I too remember thongs when they were entirely thongthing else.

And Yes! It's been a Three Dog Night's age since I've heard "Never Been To Spain"...I must go listen now!

Have a great weekend!

Peace - Rene

darsden said...

LOL, walking into filing cabinets..!

Three Dog Night-rightous song by them love it! They were my first concert ever went to with my sister and brother and friends I was like 8, I still have LP's from them..dang!

Pearl said...

IB, so THAT explains why I have to buy my own lunch around here!

Rene, "thongthing". :-)
"Never Been to Spain" is a rockin' little song, isn't it?!

Pearl said...

Dar, I have a couple of their albums myself. And yes! Real albums!

My first concert? Would you believe the Jackson 5?!

Barbara Blundell said...

I well remember when women wearing trousers for work were frowned upon. Also a friend turned up for work in fashion boots and she was taken home by a senior member of staff to change into shoes !

Comedy Goddess said...

It takes a very confident guy to wear flowers in his hair on a bus.

Never Been to Spain is no longer missing on my iPod! Thanks!

powdergirl said...

What is it about 'Never Been to Spain"
Makes me want to snap on nothing but a thong and a pair of flip-flops, hit the airport and head south to dance with non-english speaking men of swarthier skin than mine.
"I kinda like the music"

Think its casual friday at the air-port ?

Great post Pearl, I'm still laughing : 0

Pearl said...

Barbara, my first job did not allow the women to wear trousers (I would say "pants", but I know it makes the Brits giggle!).

Comedy Goddess, the man on the bus is quite a bit more comfortable with his sexuality than are some of his fellow riders!

Pearl said...

powdergirl, it's ALWAYS Casual Day at the airport! Been there lately? Yikes. Last time I flew I sat next to someone who wore pajama bottoms and slippers. Didn't know whether I should read her a bedtime story or take her shopping. So I ignored her. :-)

The Jules said...

The attractive body parts either on show or tastefully covered, usually claim only the odd furtive glance, and then a look away as you don't want to be caught. I mean cause offence.

It's the unnatractive bits that, paradoxically, get the most stares. The too small bra causing the "4-boob effect" or the big fatty showing off an intimate tattoo which is somehow supposed to improve things. Or the bloke in a kilt.


Also - you said "pants". Heheheh.

mbuna53 said...

You know me, well maybe you don't, but Pearl does. I'm pretty laid back, mellow dude, but....I HATE FRICKIN' FLIP-FLOPS! I can't stand the sound of those things going up and down the hall. I'd like to outlaw them damn things!

Thanks. I feel better now.

Have a nice day.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Was that guy on the bus this morning going to San Francisco?

Kavi said...

Wearing flowers in the hair is part of tradition here !

And you will see it on the posts soon !


lizspin said...

Thank you for reminding me of the "other" thong. . . I'm gonna try it out. . .

Roshni Mitra Chintalapati said...

Re: Kavi...but you still wouldn't see men wearing them!!! :D

I totally agree about the butt thing...it just riles me up so much when people expose what is definitely their most unattractive feature!!

Vic said...

I still slip and call them (flipflops) "thongs". My kids roll their eyes at me.

You fell for the Naked Friday flyers too, huh?

The Peach Tart said...

Next thing you know it will be whale tale Friday

Pearl said...

Jules, so you know about the 4-boob thing, huh? I do agree with you that it is the body parts in too-small clothing that cause the most offense! (And you know, I haven’t been quite the same since finding out about the “pants” thing. It’s so amusing how often it comes up…)

Mbuna, I didn’t know how much you hated thongs – er, flip-flops!

Mjenks, I’m not quite sure what he was doing, other than commuting. I do suspect that his work has a relaxed attitude toward gender-restraint…

Kavi, flowers in the hair make me think of Rita Hayworth or Hedy Lamar…

Lizspin, the “other” thong. :-D Not sure why, but that made me smile.

Roshni, why have so many become so casual about butts?! I don’t understand!

Vic, I must admit I still refer to the flip-flops as “thongs” as well. :-D

Pearl said...

Peach Tart, well done. :-)

ellen abbott said...

Well, that made me laugh, think I'll stick around. I always wore thongs on my feet and between the toes was bad enough. I also learned to type on a typewriter and pants?! Right! Couldn't wear them to public school no matter how cold the day, couldn't wear them on 'upper campus' at the first college I went to (can you figure out why there was more than one?) and certainly couldn't at my job (well considering my job list maybe only a couple).

Pearl said...

Ellen, pleased to meet a fellow historian. :-)

Anonymous said...

I used to work with a girl who was honestly really, really nice. Friendly, sweet, likable indeed. However she wore the lowest cut tops I have ever seen. I have no idea how she didn't pop right out of those things as they certainly left no room for any sort of bra. I mean she was pretty and looked good don't get me wrong, but in an office it's probably not all that appropriate to have most of your boobs hanging out. I have a feeling the boss was always on the verge of saying something about it to her but SOMEHOW he always seemed to get distracted.... Hmmmm. :)

marjean said...

I like the idea of flowers in your hair...Don't know why anyone would want to wear "Butt Floss". As for tight low cut pants...do people really think we want to see their overhang or their crack every time they bend over?

Pearl said...

Vegetable Assassin, you may be right about the boss being a bit distracted!

Marjean, I blame all the people who believe that they're perfect the way they are. :-) No matter what size, what degree of physical fitness, no matter how tight the clothing, these people are perfect just the way they are. :-)

Pop and Ice said...

Pearl: Someone else who typed and used white-out then phased into CRTs! At last....I'm not the only one out here in blogland to remember that time! And regardless of what the dress code is, I've always worn dresses or skirts and blouses with jackets or cardigans. I just don't feel right in slacks, although I have a couple pair - that I look at - but hardly ever wear. And I LOVE my shoes! I may be interviewing for a job in a really casual atmosphere. Guess I'll have to see how it goes!

Chaka said...

When I was young "thongs" meant flip flops you wore to the pool. My kids do a double take whenever I use that word. I must be gettingn old.

♥ Braja said...

I'M BACK!!! My computer!! It's fixed!! Yes!!

OK I've calmed down now.

Well hell, it's been THREE FREAKIN' WEEKS.

And just so you know? I'm gonna copy and paste this comment and post it on all the blogs I visit....:))))