I’m about to confess to something that may change your opinion of me. What I do, in the privacy of my own home, may be something you find unforgivable in the people you live with, something you find annoying in your friends. I have my excuses, as we all do for our bothersome behaviors; but the excuses mean nothing, really, because I understand how maddening I can be.
You know how cable television has the same lousy movie over and over again? Whole months of “The Godfather” or “Pulp Fiction” shown daily?
Well, I watch them. Yep, I watch them on the TV, even with the good bits bleeped out or removed all together.
This drives Willie nuts.
“For cryin’ out loud, Pearl, we have this movie on DVD! Why don’t you just watch it right?”
Because I’m not really watching the movie, Willie! Well, okay, I am kind of watching the movie, but I’m also cleaning the house, doing the dishes, calling people, dancing about uselessly or plotting my next blog post...
After all, what would I do without those lousy commercials? Nothing would get done!
What’s that? Turn off the TV?
That’s just crazy talk.
I can “watch” the hell out of both “Goodfellows” and “Shaun of the Dead”. I run the vacuum, sucking up whole cats’ worth of hair, waving the hose above my head and into corners to rid the room of those unexplainable cob-webby bits that sometimes show up on the ceiling – all without missing any of the movie!
There’s the iPod as well, of course, but I enjoy the background muttering of the TV. Honestly, I consider it a weakness and something to be hidden, but I’m feeling confessional today.
And now you know.
I hope we can still be friends.
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