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Thursday, March 19, 2009

Happy – Hic! – St. Paddy’s Day

Tuesday was St. Paddy’s Day, a day normally reserved for quiet contemplation with a book of poetry, perhaps a cup of tea.

But they do it differently in St. Paul. Beer! Can you imagine? Beer and whisky associated with the Irish…

What can one do? When in Rome…

Kathy and I met at her house at 11:00 and went to Modern Café (or as I childishly refer to it: the Modren). A cup of butternut squash soup apiece, their roast beef special – this is what we in Minnesota refer to as a “base”.

Because, you know, since I realized last week that I’m 47, rather than the 48 I’d been telling everyone since January, I feel like having a beer.

We took the bus from Northeast to Minneapolis, where we met up with Steph; and from there we caught another bus to St. Paul. The bus was the perfect place to plan the upcoming Art-A-Whirl garage sale, maybe wheedle “new” clothes out of your friends. (Kathy and I agreed that while we thought we could probably fit into Steph’s shirts and jackets – Stephanie being a slender young thing – we wouldn’t be able to get into her pants no matter how many beers we bought her. Ba-dum-bum!)

At the Top Hat, a bar crawling with the green-clad, the glitter-strewn, the joyfully drunken, we met with Kathy’s ex-workmate.

It was at the Top Hat, too, that we agreed to avoid the Nomad, where they lock the doors at 3:00 and the beer is free until – until! – someone uses the bathroom.

Can you picture it? Can you picture the abuse directed toward the poor woman who heads towards the bathroom first? Because you know it will be a woman to need to go first!

Not for me, sir!

Kathy’s friend Jeff invited us back to the Radisson, where an enormous family gathering (his!) happens every year for St. Patrick’s Day. Children everywhere, elderly folks at tables, everyone in green.

Two separate leprechauns pushed corned beef sandwiches and cupcakes on us, and we gradually sobered…

Dammit!

From there, we went to The Liffey and then to McGovern’s.

But by then, the suspicion had become the obvious.

I was getting sick.

It might’ve been an unseasonably warm day in March in Minnesota, but it was still March in Minnesota. The glands in my throat declared war, my head pounding with the intensity of a thousand clichés, the sound of my breathing reminiscent of someone playing the accordion.

Badly.

By the time we reached the free bus home around 6:00, I was outrageously sick.

And I know it’s going to be hard for work to swallow, but I called in sick the next day. My voice alone (picture a large, mud-encrusted toad, perhaps one with a cigar in its mouth) should tell them the truth, but calling in sick after St. Paddy’s Day looks suspicious, no?

Next year, I am so not being Irish.

26 comments:

mbuna53 said...

Tisk, Tisk Pearl.

What are we going to do with you young lady?

Hope ya had a lot of fun.

Next year you should go see Boiled in Lead at First Ave.

naperville mom said...

the sound of my breathing reminiscent of someone playing the accordion. Awesome:)

Hope you get better soon...

darsden said...

Hey if you can't hang with the big dogs...stay your butt on the porch! LOL Pearl hope you are feeling better :-)

Jodie Kash said...

It's truly a PEARL (get it?) who blogs well and each and every day, sick or not.

And (to steal from Stephanie Klein), it’s not slogblogging - powering through it because people expect it.

You had me at “hic!”

The Jules said...

You had booze on St Patrick's day?

Dear oh dear. I think you've probably upset quite a lot of Irish folk there . . .

Frank said...

You mixed butternut squash soup with corned beef and still wonder why you got sick??? Glad you didn’t, CROAK!

I forgot a year of my age too. Must be something to do with the year we were born...

underOvr (aka The U) said...

Hi Pearl,

Get well soon my dear.

U

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Wait...I thought when in Rome, you swilled chianti and drove around on a scooter. Am I missing something here?

SparkleFarkle said...

Good God, woman, you're a trooper! You wouldn't find a sick me pounding away on the keyboard, even if my shade be the lightest emerald! You are commendable, truly commmendable. *ties on apron* I think I'll make you some of my special recipe, get-well-soon, chicken soup muffins! They always manage to to save the (sick) day! *scratches head while searching the pantry shelf* Now where'd I put that green food coloring???

Suzy said...

Sounds like a fabulous time and now I want roast beef and green beer for breakfast.

Douglas said...

Alcoholic beverages and the Irish? Balderdash! I won't hear of such a thing. My Irish immigrant grandfather would roll over in his grave behind Murphy's Elbow Room if anyone had suggested such a thing.

We celebrated it sanely at our home over that traditional Irish dish Lasagna with 14 or 15 close friends, some of whom I actually know.

Eskimo Bob said...

I can empathize.

This one time in college - my friends and I went to an all you can eat pizza buffet. Of course we had a contest to see who can eat the most - apparently I was the only one playing.

We started writing sketches for our comedy troupe and . . . well, there's a skit called: The Barfing Eskimo.

derfina said...

We have a saying down here-self inflicted gets no pity!

MichelleJ said...

Pearly-Q if you cannot hold your corned beef than perhaps next year just have 3 pints of it instead of an all day buffet!!!

I'm just saying.....

What i mean is getting sick is not fun after having fun so ya know????

Not The Rockefellers said...

Egads girl! you've become a lightweight. :)

Hope you are feeling better.

Next year, tip some green Nyquil as your base.

Peace - Rene

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Sounds like it was fun until the sickness started!

And I still laugh about the age thing, that is so funny.

The Retired One said...

Now, that is just WRONG!
Sick (on St. Patty's Day?)
Something is very askew in the universe......

Sweet Cheeks said...

Hope you feel better soon Pearly Q!

Check your in box...

:)

A Woman Of No Importance said...

Oh no, from my last comment you might be thinking I had a crystal ball - Something about la Pearl being green around the gills, post-St. Paddy's!

Hope you feel better soonest, petal Pearl x

Pearl said...

Mbuna, next year, I vow to stay indoors!

Naperville Mom, it is SO boring, being sick…

Hey, darsden! Yeah, it sucked. Here it is Thursday and I’ve been sick as a dog since Tuesday! I’m just looking forward to breathing through my nose again!

Jodie, thank you! Like I told darsden, I’m just looking forward to breathing through my nose!

The Jules, that was my second mistake. First one was going out the front door into that treacherous Minnesota Spring!

U, thank you. I can’t remember the last time I had this big a head cold…

iNDefatigable, in Rome? Honestly, I have no idea. Have been to Mexico a number of times, but…

SparkleFarkle, chicken soup muffins! Sounds tasty. I’ll make some coffee and we’ll tawk.

Suzy, a good time was had by all!

Douglas, mmm! Good ol’ Irish lasagna. And “Murphy’s Elbow Room”? Is that a real place? Because even if it is, I need to use that.

Eskimo Bob, aye, there was a bit o’ barfing, too. It’s kind of funny, because I think there may have been a point in there where I was legally drunk, but mostly I was just sick and getting sicker all day. Stupid holiday.

Derfina, I hear ya!

MichelleJ, Oh, I’m hearin’ ya! It’s Thursday now, and my goal is to breathe through my nose AND taste food sometime tomorrow. This has been complete BS!

Rene, ain’t that the truth? Willie’s getting a big kick out of it, as I rarely get sick.

Blogging Mama, yep, and I’m still a’wheezin’. I think it’s been years since I had this kind of cold. It’s crazy. But hey! I’m only 47, not the 48 I’ve been telling everyone, so I got THAT going for me!

Retired One, I agree! I was laughing and having a good time until about 3:00, and it all went downhill from there…

SweetCheeks, thank you!

Woman of No Importance, oh, I’m green alright!!

HumorSmith said...

Hiya Pearl, I treat St.Pat's Day as I do all other holidays: I refuse to drink with amateurs.

My silly readers comment was in response to your comment on Vic's blog. Yeah, I am silly. I'll take that sobriquet gladly.

Thinkinfyou said...

LOL! You poor thing!

Douglas said...

Yes, Pearl, Murphy's Elbow Room was (maybe still is) a little tavern on West Dixie Highway right about the county line between Dade and Broward Counties here in Florida. My grandfather would pile us all in the car to take us swimming at the beach and we'd stop along the way at Murphy's where Grandpa would bribe us with Cokes and potato chips to not mention it to Grandma.

De Campo said...

This is exactly why I take off on St. Patrick’s Day. I’ll celebrate being Irish the other 364 days a year thank you very much. It’s amateur night I tell you!

This has nothing to do with the terms of my parole after the unfortunate “burning an effigy of the Queen incident of 97”.

Adrian's Crazy Life said...

That's OK, I just did the exact opposite. I'm 48 and I've been thinking I was 47 all year. Yikes, I just realized that I'm going to be 49 this year. That is just tooclose to 50 for my comfort. Wanna trade?

ladyfi said...

Poor you! Try being Scottish on Hogmanay instead...