Got a call this morning from my friend Mary. It was 7:30.
I answered it on the bus. “Hello?” I whispered. Miss Considerate-On-The-Bus, that’s me.
“Hey! Who’s that tatted-up guy on Celebrity Rehab right now? Super-skinny? Mighta been a singer and is now a crack head?”
“Seth “Shifty” Binzer,” I whispered, “from Crazy Town.”
“Thanks! I knew you’d know!”
Yep. I’m that girl. I’m your mobile shout-out.
Not on all subjects, believe me. You can’t trust me to know one astronaut from another, my answer to anything “Watergate” related is “Ehrlichman”, and I’m terrible with distances. How far is it from the Vatican to Geneva? I dunno. This far?
We all have friends like that, though, right? People we know that will answer the phone, people who know the weirdest things…
My friend RD, for instance, is a biology teacher. Ask him anything biology related, and he’ll tell you. For the price of a Whisky Tonic, RD will tell you everything he knows about the topic at hand.
And for another Whisky Tonic, he’ll stop.
I once watched him, this Viking of a man, drunkenly pull up a pant leg to explain the tibia profundis or femur talahatchee or whatever he was talking about… All I remember is that he was quite sincere about it, his leg up on the table, pointing out something terribly important.
If I could only remember what it was…
OK. So don’t call me about astronauts, Watergate, distances, or leg muscles.
Yikes. This keeps up, I’m going to lose shout-out status.
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